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Argon -- Editor

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Morticon back to "Normal"

Morticon, local wallaby and alleged leader of the Society of Evil Doers, found relief from his transformation to goat form.As reported in last week's edition of @Action News, Violet, local scent-taur, found herself in the form of a goat. Apparently Morticon, after messing around with her goat form found himself in the form of a goat. The exact circumstances of his transformation are unclear.

After "suffering" as a goat for a while, Sanogan, former siberian tiger and current centaur, who offers form changing assistance as advertised in the May 29, 2005 edition of @Action News offered to change Morticon back to his wallaby form. Although unable to speak, he indicated that he would accept Sanogan's assistance.

A group of curious by-standers followed along to observe the process. Sanogan asked if there were any suggestions for alteration to the wallaby's normal form as he prepared to make the change. Although the group offered several ideas, Sanogan only accepted a few and with some seemingly magical phrases and such, Morti was transformed! Although returned to wallaby form, Morticon's fur was now black, and he was more muscular and "buff" than he had been before. However, he still retained vestigal goat horns, and seemed to have small spines down his back and along his tail.

After being changed to this new form, Morticon hopped off. As of press time, Morticon has retained his new form and seems pleased with it.

Who's Line is it (anyway?)

The fifth edition of the SpinDizzy version of this popular game show took place Friday night. As usual it was a lot of fun for both the audiance and the "actors".

There was a scene that the group improved concerning landing on the moon where everyone had to use a couple of phases suggested by the audience. The phrases had very little if anything to do with landing on the moon, and it was fun trying to pick out the suggested phrases.

In addition, the group a poem with each one doing one line and the next having to make it rhyme, and common phrases which involved being pulled over by the police and using cliches, and scenes from a hat.

Event organizer, Morticon said, "Well, we had some funny spots, and a good attendance, so we'll be back again soon. Also, we are looking into having practice sessions (like a workshop) to make sure we all can be even funnier." to you.

So keep a lookout on the Bulletin Board and the Eventlist for the next edition of SpinDizzy's "Whose Line is it (Anyway?)" and plan to attend either to watch, or to play!

Morticon making it easier to build a vehicle

Morticon, in Wizard mode, has been working on, as the headline says, making it easier to build vehicles. Airplanes, cars, scooters, spaceships and gundams, can all be easily created once this "hammer" is activated.

Soon, by entering a few quick commands, you can have a working raccoon shinymobile, or a centaur wagon, or even a spaceship or gundam to play with to battle your friends with.

Although the Rose Garden is unofficially a "no parking zone", the "Vehicle Hammer" can be used to make all sorts of cool vehicles. You can make an Ent and ride around in its branches, or one of those phantom zone panels from the Superman movies.

So be on the lookout for the new Vehicle Hammer. And if you see Morti, thank him for his work on this!

Thoughts to think about

I know that I am thinking but I do not think that what I am thinking is what I think it is but it might be something that I would think of if I could stop long enough to think about it; but all of this thinking about it has made me forget what I was supposed to be thinking about so instaid of thinking I think I am not going to do it, I think.

Am I thinking though or do I just think that I am thinking to think that I should be because if I am not thinking and only think i am thinking how can I think about what I am supposed to be thinking of and then again if I am really thinking of that which I think to be thinking about then I think that I know what I am thinking about unless my thoughts I am thinking are not my own but someone elses thoughts that I think are mine and are not so I am stuck thinking about if I am really thinking, thinking that I am thinking or thinking that someone else is doing the thinking for me and I think I am not but they think I am so therefore what I am thinking does not matter its what they think that I am thinking about that does, how do I know I think,

I think I would know if I thought but if I cannot prove that I think then I think that I will have to think about it and see if I am thinking by myself or if I am simply thinking that I think about things that I should be thinking of, or do I just think that becuase I have nothing else to think of?

How can one think and question if they think or not do they think that by thinking about if they think they will make themsleves think about something they should be thinking about insitaid of what they want to be thinking about, or in other words, we think but how can we prove that we think unless others think that we think and in turn we accpet the fact that by thinking we think we prove that yes we think and I think that by thinking that we think it makes us think more on that which we are supposed to, as long as what we think is not being controlled by someone elses thoughs or we think that we are then we can and should be able to think of what we want to think, do you think that as well? but yet the though that if the thoughts we think are not what we think they are but are something that someone else is thinking about then how do we know or how can we tell we are even thinking if we cannot think to question our thinking then how can the things we think about make us think??

In step with: Borris


Greetings and welcome to this week's edition of In Step With: This time, we sit down and have a talk with Borris, local polar bear.

Ba'ar smiles "Welcome Borris comrade!"

Borris says, "Is good to be Welcomed."

Ba'ar growls, "Okay let's start. Our readers know about you and some have even met you 'in the pelt' as it were. For one thing, how long have you been here in Spindizzy?"

Borris says, "Hm, is finding Spindizzy through friend Patchy, whom is meeting else where."

Borris says, "And has now been here for two years is thinking"

Ba'ar nods

Ba'ar growls, "He was here if I miss my guess when i arrived about 3 years ago.. Now then."

Ba'ar growls, "I understand you're from Russia. What brings you here? "

Borris says, "Siberia actually, is different place, is just being in Russia for time when was in Circus"

Ba'ar growls, "You were in the circus? What did you do in the Circus?"

Borris says, "Mother tells Borris one day "Borris, see the world, try new things, just is nyet to be eating all new things""

Ba'ar growls, "So you came here to...as it were...'see the world'?"

Borris says, "Ah, Circus, was many things. Was helping put up tents, was in Strong Bear act, learned how to ride a cycle, two and one wheeled."

Borris says, "And Dah, Borris is here to explore, but is liking here. Is finding new friends and food even :)"

Ba'ar growls, "What do you miss the most about your homeland and/or the circus?\"

Borris says, "About Siberia, well, is mising family, and seals which was having over for dinner every night (Wink) Circus life was fun, was seeing many places and people, is even going to New York with Circus once. Is then decided to leave Circus, but joined Russian Army next."

Ba'ar growls, "What would you bring here from your homeland if you could? "

Borris says, "More Potatoes, good for many things. And if is getting from Chernobly, is good for power source!"

Ba'ar growls, "Have you had a chance to talk to or see your family since coming here?"

Borris says, "Dah, is sending home letters now and then. Is keeping up with happenings. But Siberia is never changing."

Ba'ar nods

Ba'ar growls, "I know how well adjusted polar bears such as yourself are adapted to the colder climates. How do you keep cool here in Spindizzy? "

Borris says, "Is having nice ice cave to be living in. Is okay, but warm is nyet bother, is just meaning is nyet having to eat as much."

Ba'ar growls, "So is it safe to say that you are more adjusted to the warmer climes than some polar bears?"

Borris says, "Borris is having Uncle who goes to South of France every winter, is old bear, is not liking so cold any more. Uncle likes french food, its greasy and slow ;)"

Ba'ar grins at Borris "And already has the WINE flavor built in, I'll bet."

Borris says, "Dah, prebasted"

Ba'ar growls, "Speaking of food, comrade Borris..Some Spindizzians participate in being 'Care Bear Predators'. Do you do this?"

Borris says, "Borris is nyet eater of Bears of any kind. Prefers Lemurs and Bats :)"

Ba'ar nods "What are your hobbies?"

Borris says, "Making own Vodka and Tuna Treats. Using Mallet to launch things into orbit, playing bagpipes."

Ba'ar growls, "If you were made Spindizzy's king, what changes would you make?"

Borris says, "Make Morticon Jester, which is nyet big stretch of imagination. Reformat Oak tree so as always giving out good snacks. Make sure all Kits had good food and places to live. And invite more seals and punguins to come visit."

Ba'ar grins "You're forgetting...Morticon is already a jester. Now then...Who do you admire the most? " Borris paces and ponders.....

Borris says, "Parents, is hard job to do. Even harder with Morticon around."

Ba'ar growls, "I ought to know. My cub Jason's a pawful at times...."

Ba'ar growls, "I have to constantly tell him how bad Morticon is..."

Borris nods

Ba'ar growls, "now then...Do you have any plans for the future?"

Borris says, "Go to Mars, would be fun is thinking, but is big task to build ship. So will stay here, make friends, maybe eat a few, and enjoy life."

Ba'ar growls, "you have plans to stay here on a permanent basis then/"

Borris says, "Dah, is good place to be staying. Would only wander maybe to find mate, is hard to be saying."

Ba'ar nods "What secret fact or desire about you would surprise our readers?"

Borris Hmsss "Well, is nyet secret how Borris got hat, although Patchy still turns a bit green at the retelling, is hard to get hat off head of tank commander, and not take ear, but did give ear back"

Ba'ar growls, "In closing, do you have any words of wisdom for our readers?"

Borris adjusts his hat

Borris says, "Eat more potatoes, Cold is all in mind, and finding good place to be, is best thing."

Ba'ar smiles "That concludes our interview. Thanks Borris. I (and our readers) appreciate it."

Ba'ar hands you a fish in gratitude.

Borris says, "Is good interview."

Gilead's Plebian Puns

Q: Why did the wallaby grin while going to the sword shop?
A: He was a hoplophile.

Q: What's a kangaroo's favorite gladiator?
A: The Hoplomachus.

Q: What's an otter's favorite gladiator to fight?
A: The Myrmillo. :-9~~~

Q: What type of gladiator does an otter prefer to be?
A: The Retiarius.

Q: And what did the gladiotter wear to his victory celebration?
A: A new pair of penny myrmilloafers.

Q: What was the wet stuff around the feet of Hannibal's army?
A: Elefluent.

Q: How did the Romans stop Hannibal's elephants from marauding?
A: They were arrested and charged with trunk and disorderly conduct.

Q: How were they punished by the Roman courts?
A: The judges just wagged their fingers and said, "Tusk-tusk-tusk, bad elephants."

Q: Why did Romulus and Remus adopted by a wolf?
A: They went roamin' and got lost.

Q: Why didn't Romulus and Remus's other brothers make it?
A: They were only adopted by a polyesterf.

Q: How do we know Rome wasn't built in a day?
A: C'mon, they had a Senate. Nothing got done in a day.

Q: Why did Mt. Vesuvius destroy Pompeii and Herculaneum?
A: It wanted to show the Romans that the Senate wasn't the only source of hot air and ruin.

Q: What shark conquered the world's known oceans before dying at the age of 32?
A: Alexander the Great White.

Q: Did you hear the story of the ocean god who got some footwear and went on to great success?
A: It's called Poseidon in Boots.

Q: Why did the chariots' yokes keep getting longer?
A: The chariot makers got into a stupid horse-power war.

Q: Why were the chariot horses' hooves so shiny?
A: The chariot hot-rod shops had them Rome plated.

Zach's Quoted Quote Question

Can you guess where the quote was said and who said it. See the bottom of the paper for the answer...

"Pandas Running Wild videos?"

This week in history

Back issues from a year and more ago. Remember when...?

Newspaper Circulation Report

@Action News, SpinDizzy's weekly paper, apparently has a fairly healthy circulation, so we figured we'd show just how healthy it is.

Each week, as long as there's room. I'll show the 'hit graph' for the @Action News website.

Just as a note, this makes a full year @Action News has been showing our circulation numbers. Yay!

Graphic of @Action News website hits.

Bearing Up

Bearing Up logo.

Welcome to the latest edition of Bearing up, the advice column where Ba'ar (That's me!) has answers to your most challenging questions.

Dear Bearing Up,
Should I build my house out of straw sticks or bricks?
- Deciding on a number

Dear Deciding on a number:
Neither of these...Steel and glass!

Dear Bearing Up,
The local TV news says I can trust them to give me "Your news first!". Who's news are they giving me?
- D. Forest

Dear D. Forest: Actually they're lying. When they say they're giving 'your news first'. They're giving you the news as THEY see it.

Dear Bearing Up,
What brand of video tape should I buy to take videos on my vacation?
- Argon

Dear Argon:
Betamax will do fine.

Remember possums (to steal a term from Dame Edna ;-D), if you have any questions,please page mail me (Ba'ar) online or send mail to big_bear@operamail.com. Thanks.

Weekly Survey

Argon doing the survey.This week, Argon is asking, "I'm doing a survey for @Action News. The question this week is, "What jewel (diamonds, rubies, etc,) is your favorite?"

  • Findra - Big ones! Absolutely enormous ones! Preferably cut. Preferably diamonds. Preferably those that I can sell and use the money to set up an enormous carrot farm in the middle of silicon valley. I'd have a huge and successful company there. We'd have out logo as a carrot with a bite taken out of it, and the slogan 'Think root vegetable!' All of our products would be in pastel shades of orange, and would have 'C' at the beginning. Like ... Carrot.
  • Darius says, "Does Obsidian count?"
  • PatchO'Black mews, "Mine is sapphires, which are my birthstone."
  • Gilead chirps, "I'd have to say emerald. Green's pretty."
  • Sanogan gently rumbles, "Polished Onyx"
  • Kefan says, "Meteorite iron. Or crystalline bismuth."
  • Tzolkin eeeps and wakes up. "Er, favorite jewel issa Kyanite, Argon."
  • Annon - Argon - My favorite jewel is the small and highly portable variety. Its also a plus if it is loose in the setting.
  • Zach - Ruby for favorite, diamond for what I am.
  • Carl - Pearls, out of yummy oysters!

Zach's Quoted Quote Answer

When your water is low, and the stream won't flow. When you are wanting a drink, and it is not coming out the sink. Contact Beaversons Damming Surfaces, your SD plumbing specialists.

Today's location takes us to Studio One! In the audience seating a giggle is quieted during "Whose 'SD' Line is it Anyway". That giggly voice produced by Gilead, (in)famous punny otter, this week's quoted quotee.

The Doze Garden

The Doze Garden Comic Strip

Guidelines and Procedures for Submitting Articles

Submitting a story or artwork for @Action News is easy! Just send it to newspaper@spindizzy.org or qmail or page Argon, Carl or SDN about it.
@Action News is published weekly on or after 12:01 AM Eastern Time on Sunday. Most any type of story or article will be accepted. Generally, we'd prefer things that aren't out and out lies or flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of SpinDizzy. Things that occur in public areas are fair game. The things reported don't have to have actually happened, (any more than anything that happens here does) but make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of interaction that we have. These are pretty broad guidelines, but we expect good sense to apply.

Thanks! Argon, Editor @Action News