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The expedition to one of the adjoining spindizzies earlier this week resulted in the discovery of what seems to be the "brains" behind the spindizzy planet.

The explorers met and proceeded to what seemed to be a giant storeroom. This cavernous area had robots and robotic cranes and equipment moving huge crates and pieces of equipment around.

The group was directed to another room which opened up in this area which had a giant computer in the floor. The computer communicated with the exploration party through lights which it used to spell out words. Questioning by members of the party found that the computer had been rebooted at one time and had no access to backup copies of it's data before the shutdown. When asked, the computer revealed that that last reboot had been over 10,000 years ago.

The computer also warned the group that it was preparing for relaunch of our spindizzy soon. It was unable to provide an exact time or date, but indicated it was to be soon.

The 3rd annual "SpinDizzy Oscars" took place last week. It was a well attended event, and everyone seemed to have a good time. There was a nice buffet, and the crowd enjoyed the show. Many of the award recipients were present, and prizes were accepted gracously by all.

Of special note were awards given posthumously to Butterfluff, local fluff and later seal. The fluff was well regarded by all and is missed. Skyler, local bunny, said a few well chosen words about the fluff as the awards were announced.

Following is a list of the SpinDizzy Oscar awards from each year the ceremony has occured:

Category            2003 Winner(s)          2004 Winner(s)              2005 Winner(s)

Scariest               Eris (8)                         Roland (8)                       Morticon (9)

Cutest                 Leslie and Skyler(6)      Leslie and Vixie (5)          Vixie (15)

Wittiest               N/A                              Austin (13)                      Austin (8)

Best Morphs       Carlos (12)                   Carlos (5)                        Gilead (5)

Best Puppet        Criatura Castle (11)       SED Blimp (11)               Gina_Doberman (14)

Most Loveable   Gilead (10)                     Findra (1)                        Gilead (7)

Nicest                 Findra (10)                    Findra (16)                      Findra (10)

Cutest Couple     Gilead and Cye (9)        Argon and Mavra (9)       Argon and Mavra (6)

Best Made-Up  Species               Cetans (9)                     Butterfluff (10)                 Butterfluff (8)

Most Helpful       Argon (10)                    Argon (17)                      Argon and Chanspot (6)

Most Heroic       KevMan (9)                  Brenda and Sunshine (7)  Sunshine (11)

Most Unique       N/A                              Butterfluff (10)                 Morticon (6)

Most Improved Rper                  N/A                               KevMan and Kinsor (6)   Elizabeth (7)

Funniest             Boki (19)                       Gilead (17)                       Gilead (10)

All agree that this is a fun annual event, and look forward to the next year's ceremony.

Ed. Note: Sorry for using Front Page for this table, but I was running late and did so for expediency. It's some nasty code but it does validate.

Friday morning dread pirate wallaby Morticon accosted balloon half-dragon Beltrami and her operator fairy-kangaroo Roofus_roo in the Balloon Park. Morticon forced the two balloons to walk the plank and fall, into the water. Noting this as a less-than-fearsome fate for two balloons, Morticon then called for his attack sharks.

Morticon didn't have attack sharks, however, and settled for a pair of what he insisted were man-eating poodles. These hopped into the water and paddled eagerly towards the two. When Beltrami watched them curiously, and tapped Roofus_roo's eyes to turn on scannings of the balls of fluff. The light projected from Roofus_roo's eyes scared off the poodles, who retreated.

Morticon left to reconsider his options, and promised to have sharks in future. Beltrami looked on, mystified.

Wednesday night Cye the giant vixen and Brenda the giant cougar-fennec were looking kind of lonely, so Leslie the bunny-fairy figured they just needed company. And since Roofus_roo the kangarro was there too that was easy to do by touching Leslie's magic wand to Roofus's head and making him grow up as big as the other two!

Roofus was mighty scared to move for fear of breaking somebody, but Cye and Brenda said he was really really cute and loved getting to hug somebody their own size too. Leslie picked up Gilead the otter and put him on Roofus's giant forehead between his fairy-antennas. Terry the robot looked like it wanted to be picked up and played with too but didn't have the time.

Also Brenda who was a giant couger got herself turned into a half-fennec too! She said this was done by Nevernever who's a nice demon who likes sculpting people like they were clay dolls. Fennecs are a kind of fox with really big brushy tails and huge tall bunny-like ears that are just about the cutest kind of foxes ever so she's really happy, plus it makes her a lot taller the way her ears perk all the way up.

Skyler, rabbit, achieved a long-standing goal this week when he got his pilot's license. Skyler had been practicing over much of the past year, getting flights and class practice in when he found the time; what was missing was the chance to take the test flight with an FAA inspector. The last had been the subject of moderate betting as to whether he would ever get his test flight, as he had been delayed by approximately 2,038 weeks of inclement weather, except for weeks when the plane was itself under repair.

He finally caught a two-second window when the weather was almost good enough and the plane in respectable enough shape, and took off quickly, leaving only the frantic pleas of his regular instructor behind. Happily, all went quite well and with his 100th flight hour Skyler became licensed to carry passengers, to fly to distant airports by himself, and to enter San Francisco airspace.

To celebrate, Skyler has been paneling various magical and super-technological entitites common to the muck with an eye toward transforming back into a pair of bunny slippers. This follows the determination that approximately 65 percent of the community still thinks he's the bunny slippers, somethings he has not been in months. Skyler indicated he looks forward to getting back to the plush set.

Thursday morning Ray the cheetah built a fleet of sailing ships to explore the far reaches of Spindizzy! He made them out of a couple of sheets of paper by folding them cleverly in a way called origami and he was ready to put them out on what he said was going to be a yearlong voyage of exploration on each of the four channels of water that go out from around the fountain in the Rose Garden.

They had to get christened though and Ray asked me to do it! The important part was picking good names and I figured to pick some that would remember people we missed a lot and so I got to say "I christen thee the SS Butterfluff" for the first, and the "SS Star's Pyre" for the next, and the "SS Natasha" for the third and the "SS Lucas" for the last. The little paper boats got sailing off even though I put the SS Lucas in the water backwards the first time, and Ray said they should be out as long as a year exploring and reporting back what they found.

After that got launched Slug the skunk kit wanted to fold up a pirate ship to send after them! But he didn't know how to fold ships up and just made some wads of paper. Then Sluggette who's a girl skunk who loves Slug came in an I kinda don't understand what happened except they both left.

Cara, wolf-fox, suffered an existential crisis Tuesday morning on discovering that, looking at things in the right way, she did not exist. Cara has in a show of love given herself to be the 'suma' of dragonness Aushae. This is a form of intimate relationship in which one person gives himself, body and soul, to a dragon; the suma's body becomes a magically-linked subset of the dragon's body, and the suma's personality a side of the dragon's mind.

While those who undergo the transformation regard it as one of the most intimate and complete gifts that can be given, elastic coati-rabbit Austin pointed out to Cara that from this perspective she could be seen as a figment o Aushae's imagination, and that her belief that she existed was simply the reflection of Aushae's determination that Cara should think she was real.

Aushae assured Cara that even though she was now an organ of the dragon's, Cara was no less real for it: after all, Aushae's arms, and heart, and lungs are just as real. Cara took comfort in this assurance, which Austin noted was exactly what Aushae might have wished for.

Nikon O'Black the raccoon got stuck Thursday inside a great big blizzard that put over two inches of snow on the ground outside her house. That's a problem because she's only six inches high so that little bit of snow is a whole lot to her. But that turned out to be okay because she had some friends coming over and they could get through all the snow.

Can you guess where the quote was said and who said it? See the bottom of the paper for the answer...

This week's quote:

"Rigged"

Spindizzy's weekly Bardic Circle (Poetry/Filk gather) met Friday, March 4, at 7:00pm Spindizzy time, on Luau Beach, moderated by Sonya. In attendance, at varying times, were: Firewind, Zach, Slug, Jac, Scandal, K'purra, Saffiya, Junta, Krysta, Roofus_roo

Zach began the session, reading an untitled poem which began, From the depths where dark and gray..." Firewind and Sonya then reprised their duet from, "Phantom of the Opera." Scandal presented a sequence involving spilled grapefruit juice, and the consequences thereof. Saffiya followed that with an untitled, original poem, which began, "Let there not shine a beam of light..."

Continuing the session, K'purra read, "The Spider and the Fly," by Mary Howitt (originally published in _Sketches of Natural History_). Scandal then read, "Destruction at Meigs Field" (unattributed). Krysta followed with a "Star Trek" filk, titled, "Open Hailing Frequencies." Sonya then sang, "Sleeping Sun" (unattributed). K'purra followed, reading "The Rainy Day," by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

Krystal sang "Crymson and Crystal," by Julia Ecklar, then Sonya finished the session, singing a reprise of "Ferryman," by Leslie Fish.

Spindizzy's weekly Bardic Circle (Poetry/Filk gather) met Friday, March 11, at 7:00pm Spindizzy time, on Luau Beach, moderated by Ray. In attendance, at varying times, were: Nocte, Laura, Elizabeth, and Tarka.

Nocte started the session, reading an original poem, titled, "Shattered Truth." Changing the mood abruptly, Tarka read a super-short story set in the year 2015, about two-headed roaches taking over the world. Laura read from, "Nothing Gold Can Stay," by Robert Frost. Tarka then read another short story, which began, "Comrad Joe! We need to find out who will walk on the moon first!"

Nocte changed the mood, again, reading another original piece, titled, "Hopes Come, Dreams Go." Ray maintained the mood, reading and original, untitled poem about failed relationships. Tarka again skewed the mood, reading another short story, "The Twelve Steps to Taking Over the World." Laura sang a filk by 'steve,' titled, "Internet Things" (to the tune of "my favorite things"). Nocte presented the lyrics to her favourite song, "Only the Brave," by a group called Runrig.

Laura then sang, "Angels Among Us," by Alabama. Ray followed that with brace of original poems, titled, "The Sea" and "Clouds." Tarka concluded the session, reading another super-short story based on "Star Trek."

At that point, the session ended, and the moderator withdrew.

The next session will be Friday, March 18, from 7:00pm to 9:00pm Spindizzy time (luge S7 E4, [B]asalt [P]illars, [E]nter [P]ortal). All are welcome, either to read or just to listen. Check the eventlist for more details.

Notice: If anyfur would like to see any of the poems, songs, or filks mentioned in this or any previous edition of Spotty Journalism printed in its entirety in this column, please pmail Ray to request it. Space permitting, I will make arrangements. -R.

Back issues from a year and more ago. Remember when...?

• One Year Ago / SpinDizzy Spring Break Like a Day at the Beach
• Three Years Ago / SEDron Dumping Scandal

@Action News, SpinDizzy's weekly paper, apparently has a fairly healthy circulation, so we figured we'd show just how healthy it is.

Each week, as long as there's room. I'll show the 'hit graph' for the @Action News website.

Welcome to the latest edition of Bearing up, the advice column where Ba'ar (That's me!) has answers to your most challenging questions.

Dear Bearing Up,
Why don't we know more robots?
- I. Asimov

Dear I. Asimov:
Because if we knew too many, they'd get friendly with us and take us over.

Dear Bearing Up:
I've heard Morticon being called 'The Napoleon of Crime'. Why is this?
- Wondering

Dear Wondering:
That's because he's a SMALL CREATURE that always MEETS HIS WATERLOO!

Dear Bearing Up:
The neighbor's kid keeps me up at night playing rap music untl well after 8:00 PM. I talked to the neighbor but he just invited me in for a beer. What should I do?
- Ludwig

Dear Ludwig:
Simple, blast your favorite kind of music even louder. That'll make him shut up.

Dear Bearing Up,
My kid is driving me to drink. All he does is listen to rap music. How can I make him like good music?
- Jeff

Dear Jeff:
Lock him in a room and play his music over and over again. He'll tire of it soon and will go looking for other kinds of music.

Dear Bearing Up:
My dad is a nut over country music. I can't stand it, Can you help?
- Ice Cool Chillin' Fox

Dear Ice Cool:
If you can't STAND IT, then SIT DOWN while listening to it.

Dear Bearing Up:
Does anyone still have a rotary phone that they use regularly?
- Argon

Dear Argon:
Sure! Those who do put them right next to their polyester suits, disco balls, and Vinyl record albums.

Dear Bearing Up,
Which tea is better, Lipton or Nestea?
- James

Dear James:
Neither! Celestial Seasonings! (Not only is it good tea, they have the right mascot for it - a bear - as well!)

Remember possums (to steal a term from Dame Edna ;-D), if you have any questions,please page mail me (Ba'ar) online or send mail to big_bear@operamail.com. Thanks.

This week, Argon is asked, "I'm doing a survey for @Action News. The question this week is, 'With the SpinDizzy Oscars this week, what category do you think should have been included that wasn't?"

• Gilead chirps, "Best mav. O:-)"
• Tanuki barks, "This is a shot in the dark, because I neither voted nor went there... Lifetime Acheivement Award."
• Mavra says, "Best/Worst Consistent Punner."
• Laura churrrs, "Hmm...Spindizziest spindizzian."
• Felina - "Maybe something for the parents?"
• Morticon's answer... "Best plot."
• Beltrami draws in the air a quarter-note.(Best song.) and (Best voice.)
• Ray - It's hard to name just /one/ absent category which should have been included; perhaps it is easiest to think of who we might have expected to see nominated for something, but didn't. Then, a little reflection on what, exactly, they contribute might suggest a range of categories. Adara, for example, might have been a possible nominee in the category "Best Events," something for which she is certainly deserving of recognition and admiration.
• Carl - "Who's crabbiest', if it's any of your business."
• Suri - Best Original Song about Zinc.

you are looking for a new job and a rewarding career, like to travel why not learn from STS. You'll get to go everywhere you want, and even places you don't. You get to see the world and be paid for it! We offer financial assistance to those that qualify and job placement. Welcome to Spindizzy Trucking School, your new career is just a few miles away!

This quotes location was at the French Quarter during the SDO's and was uttered by the mysterical fox Scandal.

Congratulation to all of you that guessed right!

Submitting a story or artwork for @Action News is easy! Just send it to newspaper@spindizzy.org or qmail or page Argon, Carl or SDN about it.
@Action News is published weekly on or after 12:01 AM Eastern Time on Sunday. Most any type of story or article will be accepted. Generally, we'd prefer things that aren't out and out lies or flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of SpinDizzy. Things that occur in public areas are fair game. The things reported don't have to have actually happened, (any more than anything that happens here does) but make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of interaction that we have. These are pretty broad guidelines, but we expect good sense to apply.

Thanks! Argon, Editor @Action News