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Argon -- Editor

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Patch O'Black hosts Halloween party

This year, there was not one, but two Halloween Parties, both held in the Midnight Meadows of Jellicle Fields, hosted by local Jellicle cat, Patch O'Black and his mate, Nikon, local Raccoon.

Several folks attended one or both, including several super-heros, an ITter (a spooky clown-otter), a Mosi-taur, as well as the hosts portraying the two lead characters from Inu-Yasah. Patch O'Black assumed a wolf form, to better look the part of the dog-demon, and Nikon made a lovely Kagome.

Treats freshly grown were served, including pumpkin pie and pumpkin soda. A tub for bobbing for apples was set out, and the party was visited by a creature known as Vegi-stein, as sort of living collection of vegetables who handed out tasty vegetable treats.

Patch O'Black hopes everyone enjoyed themselves, and invites feedback in order to make next year's party or parties even better!

Morticon for President?

Presidential Super-power show down.

Spindizzy residents who came to the polls for Tuesday's election were in a rather rude shock, as there was someone extra on the ballot..


Vote for not more than one (1) candidate.

Connect the arrows with #2 Pencil

  • BUSH, GEORGE >>>> <<<< (REP)
  • KERRY, JOHN >>>> <<<< (DEM)
  • NADER, RALPH >>>> <<<< (IND)
  • WALLABY, MORTICON >>>> <<<< (SED)

Election officials couldn't explain how Mr. Wallaby got on the ballot since his party had never registered. A SED press release was quoted as saying. "We think that our candidate is the best. Sure he's inept and corrupt, but for one thing he's no more inept or corrupt than other politicians. For another, you know he's inept and corrupt up front..no need to wait until he's elected to find out."

Morticon, the SED's offering for presidental candidate, could not be reached for comment.

As shown in the accompanying photo, the contest for Ohio was finally settled by the candidates shooting lazer eye beams at each other.

Interview with Kern and Ing

Kern flys in, bringing Ing with Kern.
Kern says, "Hi! Hi and hi, and hi from Ing too!"
Argon says, "Hi Ing, Kern. Kern, you are just the bird I was hoping to see."
Kern says, "Hi...yeah?"
Kern leaps up and flies onto Argon's back to land.
Argon nods, "I hear you and Ing are doing some work on a clockwork mechanism. Can you tell me about it?"
Kern rotates its head to look at Argon.
Argons says, "Yes, I heard you two were exploring the planet and were doing somthing with it's workings. Would you like to tell me about it?"
Kern says, "We've been all over the near world, it's part of patrolling and it's something we have to do."
Argon asks, "And what is it you feel you have to do?"
Ing turns its attention to Argon.
Kern says, "Yeah, Ing..there's the mish mashing of pieces together, where they get to be something when they weren't before."
Argon asks, "What sort of pieces?"
Kern says, "That's like when we grow bears, or it's almost time to plant the new poofytails, and then there's putting new helpers together like that one springtail needed to fix her teeth up."
Ing says to Kern, "Explain, there are widgets, wonkers, wallaby's, yenome, genome, and begnomes."
Argon says, "Ah, yes... I heard about Morticon getting his teeth cleaned. Although Morticon claims to be male. I guess it's hard for birds to tell."
Kern says, "Yeah, yeah, there's widgets, that go all up into making wonkers, but you can't put too many of them together or else you turn out where the wallaby's won't wind up all the way. If they wear down too much that starts up a crop of yenomes that that's actually all right because then they break down into genomes that you use to build up begnomes too."
Ing continues to explain to Kern, "Sometimes its as easy as inserting device b into slot a, but other times..."
Kern says, "So it's all right if things break a little bit because you can use that to build new things, but they have to break the right way, and that doesn't always happen."
Kern nod-nods. "Like Ing said, sometimes you just take a b device and put it into your a slot and then it's right, but other times you can't do that because you don't fit it anywhere."
Argfon asks, "Have you all done some work on SpinDizzy itself? It's main works?"
Kern says, "Yup, ever since touching places with all the far worlds the Firebird's had us going around making sure everything's right for them to see."
Ing says to Kern, "So sometimes we have to hone parts to the right size, othertime we rearrange molecular knots and protein streams."
Argon says, "I understood at one time you all fixed SpinDizzy's mainspring. Will you tell me about that?"
Kern says, "Yeah...sometimes we have to cast brand-new parts, and tie brand-new knots in the molecules things have or irrigating protein streams."
Ing nodnods agreeably to Kern, "Exactly"
Kern says, "Well yeah, the big main spring was all ready to snap, and Ing had to run off and fix it fast before *everything* broke down where nobody would be able to fix it again." (As refered to in @Action News 210)
Argon asks, "So are you and Kern maintainance workers, or do you just take care of these things because you know how?"
Ing says to Kern, "In regard to the white one, if maintenance isn't perform power may wane."
Kern says, "Ing had to sneak a brand new one in so the world didn't get gobbled up."
Kern blink-clicks..."We're birds."
Argon says, "Oh yes, very nice birds. So how did you find your way to SpinDizzy? Or have you always been here?"
Kern says, "Yeah ...Ing says if mainteannce isn't performed power may wane."
Kern says, "Everything's in the world, it's only other worlds that aren't in it."

Argon says, "Have you and Ing been to other worlds before we landed on the planet?"
Kern says, "Wherever we are is the world, that's what makes it the world."
Ing says to Kern, "We have been here all the time, working behind the clock."
Argon asks, "You mentioned The Firebird earlier. Who or what is that?"
Kern says, "The world's all the stuff birds are responsible for. Like Ing said we're always here working behind the clock."
Kern says, "Well, the Firebird, it's humongous and even bigger than the universe is and winds everybody who doesn't have somebody else to wind them up, and it can make any parts it needs anytime and put them together instantly and it always works, and it knows when the world is breaking or winding down and when it has to send birds out to fix things. Ing's a close personal friend of the Firebird."
Ing says to Kern, "You figured all that out, that's great and pretty close"
Kern says, "That's why Ing isn't always around when I am, it's because Ing's a friend with the Firebird and T-Bird and has to go see them too, it's important."
Argon says, "Well, I had some X-rays made, they didn't show any mechanical parts."
Suri says, "You might have plastic gears instead of metal. Those don't always X-ray too well."
Argon says, "True, but I've never been wound up. I don't have a key."
Kern says, "You have to have parts! Unless you're like that smoke ore pooftail." Suri snoofs?
Argon nods, "I do have parts, but I think they're organic rather than mechanical.
Star-Sight is pretty sure he isn't wind-up.
PatchO'Black mews, "I know I'm not mechanical."
Pete says, "I'm mechanical from time to time."
Ing says to Kern, "Magical, mechanical they are all the same"
PatchO'Black mews, "No, they are not."
Suri says, "Maniacal!"
Kern says, "Yeah, magical, mechanical, it's all the same, it breaks itself or by the T-bird and we have to put it right again."
You say, "Well, thanks Kern, and Ing. This will make an interesting article for the paper. Is there anything you'd like to add?"
Kern leaps up and flies over to PatchO'Black, and banks to circle around his head. Ing says to Kern, "Final thing Vote Today, Vote Anyway!"
Kern says, "Yeah, final thing vote today, vote anyway!"
You say, "Vote?"

The birds went on about their business, and the conversation then turned to mechanical terns.

Politics and root canals

The following discussion was over heard this week in the Rose Garden.

Gilead wants no more taxes. We'll just use our military to take what we need, like the imperial powers of yore. Start naming all our new weapons after famous vikings and such.

Argon says, "Ah well, I don't want to talk about Bush. Lets talk about happier things. Let me tell you about the root canal I got."

Wind-Dancer ouches.

Royce oooohs, "Story!" He sits to listen.

Argon says, "Well, my tooth hurt, so I went to the dentist, and he said, 'Breath this gas,'And the next thing I knew, I was riding a My Little Pony over rainbows to gardens made with candy...."And all the clouds were singing Popeye the Sailor Man..."And a cow and a spoon were dancing on a breeze...And all of a sudden, I was falling through the cloud...!"

Royce hm. "Hurry up and get to the part with the raccoons."

Argon continued, "And I fell and fell, and when I was about to hit the ground...The firemen came out and caught me in a net. And All the firemen were wearing masks...Because they...Were raccoons!"

Royce yay!

Argon says, "And then I woke up and had to pay the dentisy $560."

Royce awww.

The conversation then turned to setting bones in the field, paper cuts, and other topics more pleasant than politics.

Halloween chit-chat

Argon says, "Write about giant robot vampire alien grave robbing werewolves... That are superheroes."

Adara says, "Amazons!"

Terry laughs.

Argon nodded, "Amazon giant robot vampire alien grave robbing werewolves."

Casandro then arrived saying, "Servus"

Terry chirped, "Never! Live free or die!"

Gilead chirped, "Live free.... or DIEEEEE!!!!!"
Terry chirped, "Live free, or pay less!"
Gilead chirped, "Live free, or don't."
Gilead chirped, "Live free if you collect 100 gold coins on your way to free the Princess from Bowser."
Wind-Dancer said, "open source life?"
Laura churrred, "Live free, or live in the US."
Argon said, "Live free, (If you sign up for cable, DSL, satellite, GPS for the rest of your life.)"
Gilead chirped, "Live free; steal what you need."
Terry chirped, "Live expensively, die young, and leave a good-looking corpse."

The conversation then turned to root canals.

New 'Coonlective member

(from the SpinDizzy Live Journal Community) Well, time to welcome a new Coonlective member. This time it's that hyperactive, winged firefox, Wind-Dancer.

It all started at Patchy's Halloween party (the second one, the one actually held on Halloween). Brenda, being her latexy self, prodded around until she convinced Wind-Dancer to go to Patchy's party wearing her as a costume. The effect was Brenda looking like a winged red panda with a cougar coloration.

After an interesting experience of being worn (Both Brenda and Wind-Dancer could control each other's actions, but Wind-Dancer loved to pounce others and tickle and huggle them, whether Brenda wanted to or not), Brenda was prodded by Nikon to see if she can...'introduce' new members into the Coonlective.

So thanks to a Thermos filled with rubberizing Fountain water and a bit of concentration, Brenda succeeded in merging Wind-Dancer fully into her. However, Brenda remained a (latexy) firefox-framed winged cougar. No matter. She managed to encompass Wind-Dancer's soul and connect it to the Coonlective's soul.

Afterwards, Brenda managed to separate Wind-Dancer from her again by creating a liquid latex pool from her foot and create another form, a la T-1000. However, due to the cougirl's inexperience at this, Wind-Dancer became a physical, albeit flesh 'n fur, clone of Brenda (eg, another voluptuous winged firefox with a cougar coloration). Brenda currently suspects that this might be the 'Coonlective' form for Wind-Dancer, like how she's a balloonie coon for the Coonlective. Or how Laura seems to be a robot-ish-like coon, or Miss a leopard-spotted coon, or Argon a raccoontaur, etc...

Regardless, welcome Wind-Dancer into the Coonlective with open arms and shinies all over!

Beltrami attempts communication with screensaver

Thursday morning Beltrami, balloon half-dragon, attempted to communicate with the screensaver running on a personal data assistant handed her by Tristan, omega wulfen. The magical werewolf-like creature handed the device to her as part of the ongoing effort to find a way for her to speak. Tristan insisted it was a matter of simply writing out the words she wanted spoken, and letting the program speak them aloud. "Beltrami hoisted it with herself to the shoulder of Jessie-Tiger, grey tiger program, where she held up the index cards the mute balloon typically uses to introduce herself to strangers. She waved to it, and smiled, and found it unresponsive. Austin, elastic coati-bunny, said, "That's nothing like your prototype home, is it, Jessie?"

Jessie-Tiger shook her head. "Not directly, I don't think..."

Tristan grew frustrated at Beltrami not using the device to talk; Jessie believed she could explain. "I gather that within that device is someone like myself, whose function is to translate anything you write on the screen into a voice, perhaps like mine. So, as you would with the cards, write what you would wish to say there... and then the programm within will be happy to speak it out loud." To Beltrami's question "Who" Jessie-Tiger admitted it was no one she knew personally.

Tristan scribbled something on the screen, prompting the device to say ``You don't have to worry about feeding me. I have food in here.'' Beltrami's efforts to talk with the PDA program moved slowly until Tristan swapped out a memory card and began a screensaver. This she studied intently in the attempt to understand whatever the message might be. (Beltrami's operator pack would typicaly present a complex pattern of flashing lights which she read.)

Beltrami finally held her 'PLEASE TALK' card up for the PDA; Tristan explained that she had to write what the machine was to say. On her three-dimensional blackboard Beltrami explained "It was writing- I couldn't read," and that "[ I ] want to know program."

Finally Tristan understood, and slapped his face into his palm at the futility of his attempts to explain what Beltrami was doing wrong.

Glaring at Jessie-Tiger, he said, "You got her thinkin' there's a furson in this thing!"

Jessie-Tiger said, "Well, there's a program, certainly..." and Beltrami agreed.

Tristan explained, "The program is not a living being," and was "...nothing more than instructions for the processor, which isn't a living thing either!"

Jessie-Tiger admitted Tristan might see it that way. As Beltrami looked on disappointed that the PDA was "Big, opaque, and not [ a ] person" Tristan returned to the programming board, with the intent of making a speaking program someone could talk with.

News from Duma Mountain, or, Spotty Journalism

Ray's filk.

Spindizzy's weekly Bardic Circle (Poetry/Filk gather) met Friday, November 5, at 7:00pm Spindizzy time, in a Quiet Garden, moderated by Ray. In attendance at varying times were: Elizabeth, Stormsong, Findra, Chanspot, Ba'ar, Roofus_roo, Scandal, K'purra, Elericia, and Tarka.

Ray began the readings with an original poem, titled, "Walking Alone In the Midnight Dark," which began a Theme of submerged perceptions. Elizabeth followed with a poem by Samuel Taylor Coleridge, titled, "What if you slept?" about dreams and reality. Chanspot continued that Theme with a spontaneous, original poem (untitled) about the unreality of late night musings and perceptions. Stormsong followed with an original poem (untitled) about the reality which sometimes belies dreams, which, much to his chagrin, Ray unintentionally interrupted with a Haiku titled, "Night Owl's Morning."

Elizabeth then read a poem by Robert Browning, titled, "Perfection." Ray continued with another original poem, titled, "Beauty Begets Beauty." Ba'ar read the classic by Frost, "Road Not Taken." Ray read another original poem, titled, "Memory." Chanspot and Scandal played with another spontaneous poem, which began "ISP, ISP, words escape me at your..."

Scandal then read an untitled original poem which began "You have the soul of an umbrella." Elizabeth followed with another poem by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, titled, "A Psalm of Life." Elizabeth ran into trouble reciting it, and K'purra offered to complete the reading. Scandal read another untitled original poem which began "She moves like water." Ray then read a Haiku about the nature of creation and matter. He also read another original poem, titled, "Feast of Words." Scandal read a Haiku about Magnificent Life. Elizabeth then read another original poem by Ray, "Why Does the Cheetah Weep? (For Norok)," about the endangered state of the Cheetah.

Scandal read another original poem, titled, "Life and a Ball of Twine," likening playful gods manipulating the world to cats toying with a ball of twine. This lead to a brief discussion of topical mythology. Findra handed out Bonfire Toffee in honor of "Guy Fawkes Day," which also came under discussion.

Scandal read another original poem, titled, "The Lovers." Ray followed that with an original poem titled, "LoveHeat." Scandal read another love poem, titled, "Hazel Eyes." K'purra read a poem by John Donne, titled, "Valediction--Forbidding Mourning."

Ray changed the mood again, reading an original poem, titled, "Masquerade." At that point, the hour once again grew late, and the Moderator excused himself.

The next session will be Friday, November 12, from 7:00pm to 9:00pm Spindizzy time (luge N5 W4, [B]asalt [P]illars, [E]nter [P]ortal). All are welcome, either to read or just to listen. Check the eventlist for more details.

Side notes

Notes from the SpinDizzy Live Journal Community

How about some ideas for a better name for this column? More-like-prerecorded-than-livejournal notes? Off Muck Musings? In and Out of Character Chatter? Yes, I know these aren't the best, but I'm sure someone can come up with a better name. Jusy page #mail Argon if you have any idea!


  • Cute cover from my local free paper (attn: Royce and all raccoons) - Whiffert
  • Hi everyone! As you may recall, a couple of weeks ago I asked if anyone would be interested in attending some semi-weekly debates or discussion about philosophy. I've decided to hold the first session on Thursday, November 11th, at 7PM at the Academy (luge n3 e0, [T]he [A]cademy). If this is popular, perhaps we could hold morning discussion sessions as well? Anyone interested? - Adara
  • Kern and Ing stopped by the other morning; they announced they were quite busy with whatever it is exactly they're up to. After a while Kern and Ing started taking parts out of a cache that was in the Balloon Fields, and used it to assemble a clockwork hummingbird. We all, really, watched with fascination; Kern gave Skyler a gear to hold, just with the instructions that he had to hold it steady or else it'd made a compass lie. Morticon was amazed by the new hummingbird, which -- when it was wound up -- flitted up and started cleaning out his teeth. Kern said Morticon was in need of enough repair that the hummingbird might well stay with him; Morticon asked if he might get a whole flock. Kern seemed to agree that more hummingbirds were needed to get Morticon back to normal.

    (Kern and Ing are playing a role in the Landing Plot; they're not just going off and being weird completely on their own. Though they are being rather intensely weird as well; between being kids, machines, birds, and -- one of them -- imaginary there's a lot of mental gaps to get past.) (Futher information in earlier article.)

Newspaper Circulation Report

@Action News, SpinDizzy's weekly paper, apparently has a fairly healthy circulation, so we figured we'd show just how healthy it is.

Each week, as long as there's room. I'll show the 'hit graph' for the @Action News website.

Graphic of @Action News website hits.

Bearing Up


Welcome to the latest edition of Bearing up, the advice column where Ba'ar (That's me!) has answers to your most challenging questions.

Dear Bearing Up,
Now that the elections are over, I'm out of a job. What career path should I follow?
- R. Nader

Dear R. Nader:
You can teach classed on how NOT to run an election.

Dear Bearing Up,
Did my vote count?
- A. Pathetic

Dear A. Pathetic: If you voted, it did indeed count.

Dear Bearing Up:
Thankfully all the political advertisements have quit running on TV. But now it's ads for lawyers and car dealers. How can TV be made to be good without having to sit through commercials?
- Argon

Dear Argon: Hire the lawyers to sue the car dealers for wasting your time.

Dear Bearing Up,
Do you think President Morticon will do a good job?
- W. Allaby

Dear W. Allaby: No but I think President Bush will.

Dear Bearing Up,
I don't have a TV, I don't read the paper and the only thing radio is good for is government mind control. Who won the election?
- C. Onspiracy

Dear C. Onspiracy:
You did because you didn't have to put up with all the mudslinging and unfair attacks.

Dear Bearing Up:
Can Coatis do calculus? Can you say that 10 times fast?
- Multiplying Marsupials

Dear Multiplying:
Sure. I can also say that you have too much time on your hands.

Remember possums (to steal a term from Dame Edna ;-D), if you have any questions, please page mail me (Ba'ar) online or send mail to big_bear@operamail.com . Thanks.

Weekly Survey

Argon doing the survey.This week, Argon asked, "I'm doing a survey for @Action News. The question this week is, "Who's answer to this survey will be lost this week?"

  • Austin -- Ooh, well, my answer for that survey, then, is Beltrami's answer won't make the survey. Deep down I know you do it because you love being chewed out by a mute balloon who doesn't eat. It's all out of love.
  • Vixie says, "Is that becoming a problem?"
  • Ba'ar giggles "Morticon's...because has the most outrageous answers."
  • Vixie has no clue.
  • Phoex says, "Not mine!"
  • Cubbi says, "That's a recursive question."
  • Borris says, "Hm, Ohio's?"
  • Beltrami waves and points to herself!
  • Kern says, "I bet you lose Tuesday A Black because it's not here."
  • Ing says to Kern, "In answer to the talky one I say his answer will be"
  • Kinsor skriters, "...you mean that I wasn't just getting special treatment?"
  • Brenda -- Given the last couple weeks, I'd say my answer will be lost. If not, well, third time's the charm, eh?"
  • Firewind -- I'll bet that Morticon's answer will probably be lost.

The Doze Garden

One disadvantage of being a centaur during flu season.

The Doze Garden Comic Strip

Guidelines and Procedures for Submitting Articles

Submitting a story or artwork for @Action News is easy! Just send it tnewspaper@spindizzy.org or qmail or page @Action or sdnews about it.
@Action News is published weekly on or after 12:01 AM Eastern Time on Sunday. Most any type of story or article will be accepted. Generally, we'd prefer things that aren" t out and out lies or flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of SpinDizzy. Things that occur in public areas are fair game. The things reported dont have thave actually happened, (any more than anything that happens here does) but make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of interaction that we have. These are pretty broad guidelines, but we expect good sense tapply.

Thanks! Argon, Editor @Action News