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09/9/2001 |
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Argon |
Weekly
Survey |
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Last week, the
survey asked what's the best movie you ever saw, this week,
Argon asked, "I'm doing a
survey to be published in @Action News. What's your favorite
color?"
Rown
says, "Sunfire black metallic crystalcoat. :-)" |
Reiter
says, "I don't think I have a favorite color. I tend
to see things in black and white anyways..." |
Mouser
hisses, "Blue. It's the one color I'm sure isn't
food, so I don't have to worry about it." |
Royce
says, "Green!" |
Flutterz
says, "S'Rainbow!" |
>>>
Lia says, "What do you call that sorta greenish
purple color? :)" Argon says, "Not sure,
Aqua?" Lia says "No, that's blue. Never mind,
I'll go for that orangy-blue color instead. :)" to
you. |
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Argon |
Webcams
- What's The Point? |
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Ok. You get on line and find someone or someplace that's
got a webcam set up. You decide to take your chances and
go see what's on it. Sometimes the name of the site, mycat.com
or contentsofmytoilet.org will give it away but usually it's a
mystery. Anyway, you connect, and what do you see?
Usually some guy sitting in a chair with his computer monitor
reflected in his glasses as he smokes a cigarette. Occasionally,
you can connect and watch them pick their nose, or leave,
exposing the size of their big butt to go to the bathroom, and
return with a bag of Cheetos.
The question is, is this how our advances in technology are
being used? If so, was it worth the trouble of developing
this technology to see the hairstyle of someone you've never
seen or met before, and what they look like as they zone on in front
of their computer? I say it's not.
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Argon |
"Sure
is quiet." "Yeah, too quiet!" |
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Well, not much going on this week, Folks are starting
school and or moving, and stuff is going on so some of the
regulars haven't been around. Hopefully next week, we'll
have more than just what I saw and what Maxl has gone on about.
Send something in to argon@spindizzy.org
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By
Maxl, former editor & world-renowned cynic |
EDITORIAL: How to cope with your brand-new massive load of homework OR
What, you mean we get graded on this? |
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It's that time of year again! Children and drunk children the world over are flocking to their
classes, and thanks to last week's column are now much happier than they ever were while they were
star students in high school. But you might be surprised to find that you're failing classes
now! Could it be because you're a giant lush and contradict everything that the professor ever says?
No, it's because you're not doing your homework, you big idiot. Here's a handy guide to make sure you get your homework done on time, or at
least soon enough to still get the professor to look at it and maybe even bother grading it!
* Get a shiny new laptop. This won't help you with your homework, but you can always look busy. And it's shiny!
* Do your papers at the last minute. NOTE: Do not drink before writing your papers at the last minute.
* When writing papers/doing homework for: * English: Make sure to use lots of allusions to better papers than
than yours, preferably quoting them in their entirety. Frequently reference the obvious superiority of
the professor's favorite author to whatever you're currently reading, unless it's the professor's
favorite author, in which case indicate why s/he is superior to all other authors.
* Math: Why the hell are you taking a math class you have to write papers for? NOTE: You should always have one beer before doing
any math homework. Or more than one.
* Social sciences: As often as possible, mention the patron saint of your particular social science. Oftentimes this is the founder,
or the professor's favorite practitioner.
* Philosophy: See above.
* Biology/chemistry/physics/any engineering: Same as math, only more intoxicated.
* Computer science: Have a much smarter person do this homework for you by insulting their collection of Final Fantasy action figures and
saying they have no 'mad skillz'. NOTE: This works for all 'science' related categories. Unless you really want somebody who has a
collecttion of action figures writing your term paper for English.
By using your great new study skills in combination with the magical powers already learned through previous articles, you can
now complete college just as well as your parents did!
Not responsible for advice taken, except the author does recommend
one beer before doing any mathematics more complicated than calculus.
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Argon |
The
Doze Garden |
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@Action
News Info |
Guidelines and
Procedure for Submitting Articles |
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Submitting a story
or artwork for @Action News is easy! Just send it to newspaper@spindizzy.org,
or qmail or page Argon about it.
Most any type of story or article will be excepted.
Generally, we'd prefer things that aren't out and out lies or
flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of
SpinDizzy. The things reported don't have to have actually
happened, (Any more than anything that happens here does.) but
make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of
interaction that we have. These are pretty broad
guidelines, but we expect good sense to apply.
Thanks!
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