@ Action News

Argon -- Editor

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Don't worry about the big falling

Ing and I want everyone to know they don't have to worry about the big falling next week. We figure we should have everything ready for it so none of the unbirds have to worry about themselves. If you want to take any extra precautions against something going wrong when the city falls over the edge that's okay but please ask before you dig up anything that's important, because we really don't want to rush and don't want to be late either.

Editor's note: Kern, and his friend Ing, have claimed to be maintaining the workings of SpinDizzy for years. They percieve it as a large clockwork mechanism, and, being birds, see it from that point of view. More information about Kern and Ing can be found by going to the @Action News web site, and entering 'Kern and Ing' in the Google search box. You'll get a list of all the @Action News articles about the birds.

I suspect in this case the birds are refering to the much anticipated seperation of SpinDizzy from the spindizzy planet and the continuation of its journey through space. Keep an eye on the bulletin board (+read from anyplace on the muck,) for additional information as it becomes available.
- Argon, editor, @Action News

Preparations Begin for a Jellicle Ball

As of last week Zach got together with Patch O' Black to discuss the issue of Patch not feeling very Jellicle. Patch explained that there are few other genuine Jellicle Cats on Spindizzy so it has made it rather awkward to stay Jellicle most of the time. Additionally, by not feeling as Jellicle Patch's Jellicle powers now seem to have waned.

Zach grew concerned and suggested that maybe Patch could pass on part of his powers to others, in the process making some others Jellicle. Patch explained that Jellicleness could not exactly be passed on to others in such a way. With that option unavailable it was looking grave for Patch.

Zach than suggested that Patch and him work together to put forth a Jellicle like event where Jellicle things might happen. Patch thought this might just work out but was unsure if he could be of much help. Zach insisted that if he was going to help organize it that Patch must be involved or else the event won't be very Jellicle and therefore not worth the time.

The Jellicle event suggested was a Jellicle Ball. An event that includes dancing, and singing and generally showing off ones talents. Being a Jellicle Ball there is some limitations that must be committed to, for example a Jellicle Ball may happens only once a year. Other parts would be left more open, for example all folks are invited to the Jellicle Ball. Additional Patch at the time did not want to do the traditional Jellicle cat being reborn to a different Jellicle life. Patch did suggest the ideas of perhaps creating a Jellicle Cat at the end of the proceeding as opposed to the traditional trip to the Heavyside Layer.

As of this time no date is exactly set though the intent is on Sunday night probably the 23rd of the month. Leslie and Beltrami have offered their services to assist in Jellicle tail construction. Beltrami was particularly fond of the ideas and showed off a recent tail she made. Zach asked if indeed Beltrami would be willing to make the tails for those that would attend, which Beltrami seem enthused at doing. Other folks are willing to provide decorations, though a food vendor has yet to be picked. Borris was particularly concerned as he wanted to show off his wonderfully eating talent at the Jellicle Ball.

Generally folks seem excited at the prospect however Zach has shown some reserve in regard to not excluding any particular folks and by holding it only in the evening this would be a concern. Additionally Zach expects Patch to make sure things seem mostly Jellicle as this is not only for the fun but also for the future health of Patch. If you have question or can offer assistance, please contact either Patch O'Black or Zach and check back for additional details.

Zach and Darius become plush

Zach, local pre-teen human, and Darius local culvert spirit, made a visit to Care a Lot, The two were considering building or renovating an interactive playground, and wanted to look over the one in Care a Lot. To get there, enter CAL then R to the Rainbow Bridge to the Forest of Feelings, then F to go through the forest, and then C to find the Clearing. From there, enter P to go to the playground.

Zach talked about their visit in the Rose Garden this week. He said that after he and Darius were there for a few minutes, they started acting differently. He said, "Yeah I would say we were acting like, well, five year olds. When we stopped playing there was something different about us. Darius had turned a bright sunny yellow, and myself a shade of blue."

Zach continued, "We also got rather softened up, well plush I guess is the word, though we were still what we are. We left the playground but we were still these soft brightly colored version of ourself, it wasn't until the next day that we changed back to normal."

Zach then commented, "Grumpybear, (Local Care Bear,) believes that there is less caring in the world so that the reason why (Care a Lot) may be doing things. Grumpybear says, a lot of the Care-Critter have gone on indefinite hiatus or something like that.

When asked if he and Darius would be returning to the Care a Lot playground, Zach asnswered, "Well I dunno about Darius, but yeah, considering I am kinda worried about Grumpybear taking it all on his own, I offered to help."

Austin, local coati, said, "Rather heroic of you, Zach." The other listeners thought so too. There was a bit of discussion about the Care Bear cousins and how Grumpy might welcome some folks who wanted to join the Care Bears in bringing love and joy to others.

Gilead's puns that would be thankful for your support

Q: Why doesn't democracy work on a farm?
A: The horses always vote 'neigh' no matter what the issue.

Q: Why else?
A: The mules are the only ones who pull their own weight.

Q: Why else?
A: Everyone wants to vote everyone else's money for themselves, but only a handful of the animals get to be real pigs.

Q: Why else?
A: The sheep just go along with the flock.

Q: Why else?
A: The barn cats just pussyfoot around the bigger issues.

Q: Why else?
A: Many of the citizens are too chicken to vote.

Q: Why is that?
A: Their husbands can be real cocks to them on occasion.

Q: So, why else?
A: The chickens don't care about anything but their own nest eggs, anyway.

Q: Why else?
A: The oxen can't quite be bullish on any issues.

Q: Why else?
A: Everytime the mares speak, it degenerates into an argument as to whether the stallions do their share of the horsework.
A: And then the stallions accuse the mares of being incorrigible nags.
A: And their daughters stage a fillibuster.

Q: Why else doesn't it work?
A: Everybody's constantly putting a new motion upon the floor.

Q: Why else?
A: All their initiatives tend to stall every evening.

Q: Why else?
A: The baby goats' have no family values, because they were all raised by a Nanny.

Q: Why else?
A: Robert's Rules of Order never hold, because everyone was raised in a barn.

Q: Why else?
A: Nobody can get any reliable information, because the cows' husbands lay the BS on so thick, it draws flies.

Zach's Quoted Quote Question

Can you guess where the quote was said and who said it? See the bottom of the paper for the answer...

This week's quote:

"Well, they are a bit of a calming agent. I get a little nervous when I consider I might run out, so they are very carefully labled."

Centaur on TV

Robot Chicken centaur.Thanks to Idaho Bob of the 'Taurlist, a centaur SIG e-mail list. IB reports, "Just captured a centaur sighting on "Robot Chicken", a new adult show on Cartoon Network.

This frame is from 8 min into episode 4.

No real action, other than he's being fitted for a tux. (Like the Analog magizine cover?)"

Editor's note: A search through Google.com was unable to find a scan of the cover Idaho Bob mentions. There is a similar illustration on the cover of Stellar #2 a science fiction story analogy. This illustrates a short story by James White called, "Custom Fitting", about a tailor who is asked to sew a tuxedo for an ambassador from another planet who has centaur form. I believe this is the illustration IB had in mind.

Vixie!

'Vixie' by Kittfox

Vixie, local self described cute fox, sent me this sketch of herself. As it's a slow week for news, I figured I'd include it.

It's a cute sketch, and Vixie says the image is by Kittfoxx.

This week in history

Back issues from a year and more ago. Remember when...?

Newspaper Circulation Report

@Action News, SpinDizzy's weekly paper, apparently has a fairly healthy circulation, so we figured we'd show just how healthy it is.

Each week, as long as there's room. I'll show the 'hit graph' for the @Action News website.

Graphic of @Action News website hits.

Bearing Up

Bearing Up logo.

Welcome to the latest edition of Bearing up, the advice column where Ba'ar (That's me!) has answers to your most challenging questions.

Dear Bearing Up:
Can't The Empire and The Rebellion get along?
- L. Skywalker.

Dear L. Skywalker:
Sure! Someday they'll find out how much of a nuisance Jar Jar Binks is and combine their forces (no pun intended) to hunt him down.

Dear Bearing up:
What's better, Wendy's or McDonald's?
- R. McDonald

Dear R. McDonald:
Neither Sonic! Pricey but very good!

Dear Bearing Up:
Is Morticon a wizard? He doesn't wear a pointy hat or robes nor does he carry around a magic wand.
- Wondering

Dear Wondering:
Ask him to 'TOAD' you and find out what happens.

Dear Bearing Up:
I heard that Findra worked on Easter. Is she the Easter Bunny?
- P. Cottontail.

Dear P. Cottontail:
If I told you, I'd have to kill you.

Dear Bearing Up:
Now that Vixie's been named 'cutest', will there be any serious contenders for the 'cutest' category next year?
- B. Knowles

Dear B. Knowles:
No, the competition from Vixie's too fierce.

Dear Bearing Up:
Now that Vixie's been named 'cutest', what's next for her?
- Wondering

Dear Wondering:
Queen of the universe!

Dear Bearing Up:
Is Leslie a real bunny?
- Monster

Dear Monster:
Yes she is.

Dear Bearing Up:
Is The Coonlective a good organization to join?
- Borg

Dear Borg:
Yes, but The Bearlective is a far better organization.

Remember possums (to steal a term from Dame Edna ;-D), if you have any questions,please page mail me (Ba'ar) online or send mail to big_bear@operamail.com. Thanks.

Weekly Survey

Argon doing the survey.This week, Argon asked, "I'm doing a survey for @Action News. The question this week is, 'At what tempurature are you most comfortable?"

  • From: Morticon - 150 degrees, Argon. I'm getting myself used to living in Heck.
  • Roofus_roo - My answer to the survey question is: I feel most comfortable around 70-75 F / 21 - 24 C, assuming it's not too humid.
  • Findra - I think I'm generally most comfortable at about 90F, in a nice relaxing bath. =:)
  • Darius - I am most comfortable anywhere between 55 and 80 degress.
  • Zach - "I am most comfortable at a cool temperature, because I am so."
  • Jacchus- "I prefer semi-warm Mid 70's with low humidity, thank you."
  • Sunshine - "At wallaby body temperature."
  • Star - "0 degrees, Kelvin."
  • Tanuki - "Temperature? What's that?"
  • Gilead - "Three-hundred-sixty-five degrees. Burning down the house."
  • Carl - Anything other than water at 212 degrees Fahrenheit.

Zach's Quoted Quote Answer

Zach's Quoted Quote Answer

For all your packaging needs Lava's Ultimate Mail Stop. We are a WIFI Hot Spots with complete connectivity along as anything for your snail-mail needs. We also have the hottest collection of stamps this side of the volcano. Don't get burned by other sellers, Lava is here for you.

Today's location takes us to the far away Fen Inn. Yes that's right not the Rose Garden, Our quote comes from Doctor Brata Fruitbat!

Congratulation to all of you that guessed right, you really deserve it!

The Doze Garden

The invasion of the people from the Balloon Planet was thwarted by unforeseen circumstances

I took the idea of this Loose Parts cartoon and sort of adapted it for the Doze Garden.

The Doze Garden Comic Strip

Guidelines and Procedures for Submitting Articles

Submitting a story or artwork for @Action News is easy! Just send it to newspaper@spindizzy.org or qmail or page Argon, Carl or SDN about it.
@Action News is published weekly on or after 12:01 AM Eastern Time on Sunday. Most any type of story or article will be accepted. Generally, we'd prefer things that aren't out and out lies or flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of SpinDizzy. Things that occur in public areas are fair game. The things reported don't have to have actually happened, (any more than anything that happens here does) but make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of interaction that we have. These are pretty broad guidelines, but we expect good sense to apply.

Thanks! Argon, Editor @Action News