Please don't forget to read the bulletin board. Enter +read from anywhere.

Saturday night in the Rose Garden, Morticon local wallaby and alledged leader of the Society of Evil Doers (SED)apparently had some sort of freeze-dried packets of monsters. After dropping a freeze dried squid in the Rose Garden fountain, it grew and, as giant squids are known to do, began crawling over dry land looking for victims.

Seeming to act under the direction of Morticon, the squid made a bee-line for Argon, local centaur. After the obligatory calamari gags, the centaur tried being a nice guy by attempting to simply pry the squid's tentacles loose, but when this failed, the large centaur pulled out a hair dryer. Setting it to 'Surface of the Sun' temperature, he aimed the hot air at the squid which immeadiately de-hydrated. Argon then gave the mini-squid to Liliahfae, local pixie.

Having lost his squid, Carlos, local giant anteater (at the time) offered Morticon his mantle, which allowed the wallaby to change his form into that of a blue whale. Flipping his tail at Argon, and using it to knock Patch O'Black, local Jellicle cat into the fountain, Morticon was somehow forced to return to his normal form by methods this reporter missed. As no one else seemed to recall what had happened, it is thought some sort of 'memory loss' device or drug was used.

Last seen skulking homewards through the rose bushes, Morticon claimed that he would have other 'Just Add Water' monsters in a short time. The crowd's reaction was requests for giant chickens so there would be big drumsticks, and perhaps some giant tomatoes.

Royce, local Raccoon and well known supporter of Raccoon Day, has been recognised once again for being 'Raccoony'.

Having last been noted and reported in the July 16, 2000 issue of @Action News, Royce's uninterupted high level of 'raccooniness' has been admired and envied by many for years. Although never being seen at a lower level than, ++7, or 'Hungry' (The usual levels being very hungry and really hungry, though on most occaisions really really hungry,) Royce has also kept his raccooniness at a high level with his enjoyment of shinies. His shiny collection, making that of Smaug's appearing miniscule by comparison, is a contributing, but not major feature of his raccooniness. For the most part, Royce's curiosity, friendliness, good humor, hungar, and being a raccoon, are what keep his Raccooniness level high.

Although Royce's constant high level of raccooniness was questioned by Marie-Reine Le Gougne, French representative of the Raccoon Level Judgement Committee suggested that Royce be disqualified as he had failed to repond to the opening of an aluminum foil plant in Alcoa, Conneticuit. Her objections were quickly dismissed as the paper the article was printed on wasn't wrapped n fish, wasn't shiny, and Royce doesn't read anyway.

Royce was first noted to have been continuously raccoony for 635 days on July 16, 2000 Continuing unababted as of the date of this issue of @Action News, Royce's raccooniness has remained at a high level for 1416 days, or a little over four years and seven months. When asked for a comment concerning his amazing accomplishment, the modest raccoon stated, "Royce Hungry."

When we last reported to you information about the virus ("You feel that you have something that is mostly harmless" @Action News 8/25/2003), only a small percentage of the population was infected. That number has doubled as of yesterday. It is estimated nearly 50 people are infected. That's about 10% of Spindizzy's total population! Clearly this is becoming an epidemic.

With our limited facilities here in downtown Neopolis, we've been unable to learn much about the virus. What we DO know for sure is that it spreads from person to person via an unknown method and not everyone who comes into contact with an infected person gets infected. The virus cannot live without a host. Our voluntary test subjects have also not experienced any pain or side effects related to the virus, so you can rest assured that nothing bad will happen if you have been infected. The cure still remains unknown.

We here at Spindizzy Health and Wellness are calling upon the unusually large number of labs on Spindizzy to aid us in the virus research and it's eventual cure. Everyone should remain calm and go about their daily routine in the meantime.

Tired of fading into the background in a crowded room? Want to draw attention to yourself, well deserved or not, and let others know more about you than just your name and species at a glance? Then use @sdesc, or the 'Short Description' command. It's easy to set up, and can lead to hours of fun and confusion.

Rather than seeing, for an example, 'So and so enters carrying this and that' while using the 'ride' command, @sdesc allows you to set up a short message, so that (in my case) you'll see "Argon, a white, Clydesdale based Centaur, enters carrying Such and such." If you were to set your @sdesc, in place of 'Such and such' it would read whatever you entered, instead of simply your name. @sdesc also works with many other commands, so let's go through how to set it up.

Decide on what you want your Short Description to say. It doesn't have to give your name or species, but the program will automatically add your name in brackets if you don't use it somewhere in the description. Let's, for example, say you want yours to read, "Shinera, a loveable Raccoon". All you have to do is enter: @sdesc Shinera, a loveable Raccoon

You can make the message read anything you want, of course. If you wish to erase your short description, enter '@sdesc' on a line by itself. Keep in mind this works with most 'look' type commands, but not all. For instance, it displays using the 'mumble' command, but not 'mutter'. MPI can be used, if you are so inclined. So, give @sdesc a try and have fun!

This week was marked by the first time the planet Mars has been this close to the earth in 60,000 years. NASA has taken the opportunity of this rare occasion to snap some very interesting pictures of the red planet. But when they developed the images taken by the Hubble space telescope they were floored when they found yet another astounding feature on the Martian surface. As with the mysterious face on Mars, this new find has completely baffled scientists as to how it got there. Even more baffling is the fact that they can completely understand what the new find means.

"Unlike other finds this new one seems to have an Earth connection", a top scientist at NASA’s space research center stated. "This new find proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that Martians have visited Earth in the past and learned our language. We think they’re trying to communicate to us in the only way they’ve been taught. We know for certain that there is a connection to a place called ‘SpinDizzy Muck’ from what the message says. Oddly there seems to be another sign on Mars near the southern pole but we just can’t figure out what it means. Someday when we learn to understand more about the Martians we hope to understand what the signs mean.’

To the joy and appreciation of two or three fans of centaurs, at long last, Argon, local centaur has announced the re-activation of Argon's Centaur site (Note, there is some tasteful nudity on the site). The site has been in particular disarray in the last few weeks as Argon, site owner, has attempted to put the site in some sort of order, so now it's in no particular dissaray.

The site is a collection of images, information, stories thoughts and theories, and links concerning, as you might imagine from the site's name, centaurs. Being a centaur himself, it's only natural to expect that Argon would have a site about them. There is also a page of mermaids, and the reason for them being on a site about centaurs, if it isn't obvious, is explained on that page.

After gentle persuasion from Austin, local coati, to create websites and pages that can be seen on browsers other than Internet Explorer, Argon has worked hard to see that his pages are W3C Compatable. This site checks HTML code to see that most any browser will display the page properly. Argon is happy to state that all pages directly linked to the site, under the centaursite.com domain name, are W3C compatable. As Austin isn't particularlly interested in centaurs, it is doubtful he will take particular notice, but Argon feels confident that is the coati happens to look at the site, it won't make his tail rings pop off in shock from seeing terrible HTML code.

Although the site will not be appreciated by everyone, it is a good source of models for artists drawing centaurs, and information about centaurs in general, and me, Argon. The story of how I became a centaur, and a couple of pieces on my philosophy of what being a centaur is are on the site.

If while looking over the site, you see any problems, or have suggestions for information, art, or a written piece you'd like thoughts on from a centaur point of view, feel free to contact argon@centaursite.com. Thanks, and enjoy!

Welcome to latest edition of Bearing up, the advice column where Ba'ar (That's me!) has answers to your most challenging questions.

Dear Bearing Up,
I need more news for the newspaper. I know things are going on, but not having the network of spies and informants the SED does, what news is contributed is usually far more accurate than that the SED gets. Still, the paper needs more folks to report on what's going on. I know folks sometimes think that what they see or do isn't newsworthy, but surely something is happening here. How can folks be encouraged to contribute articles or art to @Action News? Thanks,
Argon - Editor @Action News

Dear Argon:
I understand your point of view. The only contributors of the paper seem to be Mavra and yourself, when in reality the paper belongs to everyone and should be contributed to by everyone. The best advice I can give you is to spread the word. Advertise that you need more articles and encourage citizens of Spindizzy you meet to create a little something special for the newspaper. Good luck!

(Editor's Note: Just to be clear, there are a lot more contributors to the paper than Mavra and me, including Ba'ar who writes this column each week, all of who deserve credit)

Deer Bareing it.
Hows com all of a suddan every 1 is so exsited abut how u tipe and spel hear? Whut duz it matter how u speel if u can innerstan what teh werds mean? Whutz the beeg deel?
signed Arzeekial_24pwrgmr_el33t

Dear Arzeekial_24pwrgmr_el33t
In the online world, how accurately you type is a good indication on how well educated and mature you are. Bearing Up advises you to go back to school and stay there until you can spell reasonably well.

Remember possums (to steal a term from Dame Edna ;-D), if you have any questions, please page mail me (Ba'ar) online or send mail to big_bear@operamail.com. Thanks.

Every other week, I will be calling attention to the new members of our community. (Editor's Note; ...with the permission of each of the new folks featured, of course. Folks who don't want to be featured in this series, will of course, have that wish fufilled.) This is not to embarrass them, but rather I do it in the hopes that it will encourage everyone to give them a special welcome and friendship.

The following members are new to our community as of a week or two ago at most. Please give them a warm welcome and offer assistance if needed. Who knows, you might even make a new friend or two!

• Cortello - Male Vampiric Humanoid
• Kairo - confident curious disorganized dizzy flying helpful toon winged youthful Male Mixed-Up Bat - "Kee-wah!"
• Wyckoff - cute disorganized toon jackanapes surreal gregarious male Cartoon Wolverine - "Well, thank you. I'm happy to be recognized in my own time, particularly if it's right before lunch."
• G'ayle - Male Astral Dragon
• Parco - Robot
• Phoex - winged curious male Vulpine
• Cailen - Female Siberian Tiger
• Marcus - Male Winged Wolf - "And what will happen; will I dream? I am too scared to close my eyes..."
• Tami - female coyote

This week, Alex asked folks, "Who do you think would make the perfect couple and/or what couples have you seen on Spindizzy?"

• Butterfluff says, "Looks like Jack and Diamond are ... couplish."
• Argon picks Cye and Gilead.
• Ceralor growls, "Kor'Laki and I."
• Brenda opts to answer the second part to the question as she's not sure if there COULD be a 'perfect couple' "there's Cye and Gilead, Argon and Mavra, Patchy and Nikon....er...me and Mephox....and that's all I can really think of right now..." =*^.^*=
• Elissa yaps, "Beth and me?"
• BarterGarter hisses, "Maybe Sunshine and Terry? Or slug. Or Hefon. Somebody armored, at any rate."
• Lilahfae -- "The couples that I have seen so far have been Diamond and Jack, and KevMan and Adara. Who would make the perfect couple? My mom, the mushroom, and the caterpillar-man down the road.
• Ceralor -- Well, there's me and and Kor'Laki.
• Wyckoff -- I'm voting for Argon, Brenda, and Ceralor as perfect couple. They're even alphabetized for our convenience.
• Alex: "My own would be Argon and Marva"

If only muck commands worked in real life.

Submitting a story or artwork for @Action News is easy! Just send it to newspaper@spindizzy.org or qmail or page Argon about it.
@Action News is published weekly on or after 12:01 AM Eastern Time on Monday. Most any type of story or article will be accepted. Generally, we'd prefer things that aren't out and out lies or flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of SpinDizzy. Things that occur in public areas are fair game. The things reported don't have to have actually happened, (any more than anything that happens here does) but make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of interaction that we have. These are pretty broad guidelines, but we expect good sense to apply.

Thanks! Argon, Editor @Action News