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SED Press Release Skittles are harmless
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There has been a rash of furs morphing randomly in the park recently, and some have incorrectly linked it to eating one of Morticon's Skittles just moments before the transformation.  "There is nothing in the Skittles but wholesome Skittles goodness," claims Morticon, SED Leader.
 
Morticon assured the press that the transformations are purely coincidental and are in no way related to the supposed shroomie farm incident or the Skittles themselves.  "I am merely passing out candy so that all may have a moment of happiness in their otherwise oppressive life," Morticon states.
 
In summary, if Morticon or any other SED member gives you some Skittles or other bite-sized candy, don't be afraid to pop it into your mouth and enjoy it.
By:  Lamar The SED BookLlist:  The Darwin Awards
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If you haven't heard of the Darwin Awards by now, you're probably not using the same Internet as the rest of us. Comprising a collection of people demonstrating such stupidity, they remove themselves from the gene pool. Often by Inane Death, but accidental sterilization also counts.
 
This book serves as a collation of 185 of the Awards, Honorable Mentions, Personal Accounts, and Urban Legends. The stories are arranged in categories from the pyromania of 'Up in Smoke: Fire and Explosions' to the wince inducing 'Man's Favorite Toy: Penis Envy'.
 
Each story is clearly marked as confirmed, unconfirmed, or plain not true. (Something that sets it apart from the run of the mill 'Urban Myth' book) And some stories come with little box outs explaining either the science behind what happened or the science debunking it as a myth. The introductions to each section often have little to do with the stories contained but are still mildly entertaining backgrounds on the philosophy behind the Darwin Awards.

Basically, this is a paperback version of some of the stories that have been available for free on the Internet. Paperback, and priced for the Airport or Bus Station market. (UKP5.99 or $16.95 US) If you've read most of the stories already, this may not be your idea of a worthwhile buy. If you've read some of the stories, and didn't find it at all amusing, this is definitely not a good book to read. If you've seen a few stories, and see this book while waiting for a long distance train, you might find it a interesting and often funny diversion. Otherwise the book doesn't add that much more to the texts available for free.

 
I give this a Six out of Ten. Not a compulsive buy, but not something to outright avoid either. A note for SED members who decide to read it on the Internet for free instead. Be warned that installing a VDU in the tub so you can read in the bath might gain you a Darwin Award.

SED members are advised to use this book as a guide of what not to do. 

Title: The Darwin Awards / Author: Wendy Northcutt

BN: 0525945725 (US/CAN) or 075283871 (EURO/AUS)
Pages: 327 (US/CAN) or 286 (EURO/AUS)
Rating: 6/10
Summary: Very Dumb People Die.
By Argon Space Museum And Display On Drawing Board
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Construction is underway locally for a new tourist attraction that is hoped to be a magnet for space tourism, high tech industry, and employment. Suri, local lemur, recently described to this reporter Launch Complex 19, which is to be a recreation of the place and time of the Gemini launches.  Although currently just in the planning stages, the land has been acquired and construction is set to begin.
 
This attraction will reproduce the place from which the first two-manned space flights by the United States were prepared and launched.  Its historical and educational value will be priceless and  Austin, local Coati and space nut, will also have another excuse to tell us things about the program we didn't know or care about before.
By Argon Presidential Election Results In Chaos
 
This week, the United States was thrown into confusion by the elections held on Tuesday.  Although the race had been predicted to be close, the narrow margin separating the number of votes was extremely narrow.  During recounts, it was found that a number of irregularities were found to have occurred. 
 
While reporting on the election for The Centaur Clarion, this reporter became aware of circumstances and occurrences which only his experiences here at SpinDizzy would have made apparent to him.  While at the time, testing the Palm Beach County butterfly ballots on Wallabies seemed innocent enough, the irregularities resulting from these 'Wallaby Tested' forms, in light of my experiences here with Wallabies, seemed suspicious. In addition, it was found that Skittles candies were found at the scene of almost every irregularity occurring in the state.  Unnoticed by law enforcement were the Fursnake tracks found in a number of locations.
 
Also, reports about damaged disks, missing ballots, and voter intimidation left this reporter with no option but to consider that the SED (Society of Evil Doers) might be involved. However, the success of these actions made it unclear as to how any SED members could have been involved.  Due to the failure of officials, to whom this reporter could inform of these points, to believe in evil Wallabies or Fursnakes, this information and it's implications were kept undisclosed.
 
It is perhaps a relief to the citizens of SpinDizzy to know that the thin mental and personnel resourses of the SED are stretched even thinner as they attempt the takeover of two areas.
By:  Argon The Doze Garden
 
Info Guidelines and Procedure for Submitting Articles
Next Story When writing articles for the paper...
 
  • Try and do some proofreading before submission. That means spell check! However, if you're  no good at that sort of stuff, just send it as-is and the editors will try their best.  
  • No articles whose sole purpose is to flame someone. You can use SD BB for that ;)  
  • All parties whose names were mentioned MUST confirm with the editors that they were really involved (or agree to be involved even if they weren't there). No confirmation, no publish. See submission instructions. An exception to this is when you mention their name ONCE, and in a manner that suggests simply that they were present. If you mention their name multiple times, give a quote, or document an action by them then it must be confirmed.  
  • The editors' decisions are final. This is not a wiz-ran paper so do not complain to them. We can be reached by paging 'newspaper'.  
  • Just about anything is published, so be creative! It can be IC views on RL topics, RPs that occurred around the MUCK, or most other things you can think of. You have creative license when it comes to documenting RPs, so feel free to expound on the action, etc. If you aren't sure if a story is acceptable, page 'newspaper' and find out! :)  
  • The AUP applies so keep language, etc acceptable.

    Procedure for submitting an article: 

  • The newspaper building is located at Role Play Central (rpc). When you enter the building you will see a bulletin board.  
  • Go ahead and 'write' your story. If you decide you don't want to write one, hit .abort and forget about it. Otherwise page 'newspaper' alerting us that you wrote one when you finish pasting it in.  
  • An alternative to this is to page #mail newspaper with your story OR email it to newspaper@spindizzy.org  
  • It is highly recommended that you have everyone involved in the story page 'newspaper' confirming that they were involved and want it to be published. Otherwise, the appropriate editor will be paging them confirming, which only wastes time. No confirmation, no publish. See article guidelines for more information.  
  • Once all that is done, we will edit it and tell you where you can look at it to make sure it wasn't mangled. You can then p #mail the editor involved saying that it is ok. Otherwise, suggest changes that should be made and why. If you trust the editors feel free to put something to the effect that you pre-approve the editing.  
  • Thats it! It'll appear in the paper!

 
  The End