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Spindizzy Scientists Discover New Element! -
Spacecraft, Trees, and Chat Collide When Well-Known Furs
Meet - Kulan
Unusual Smell Noted In South-West Quadrant -
Unknown Suspect Puts Depilatory in Fountain -
Advertisement - Ask Auntie Findra -Findra
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||Spindizzy Scientists Discover New Element!|
|| After years of extensive research, some of
Spindizzy's top scientists have discovered a new element, Cutonium. So far, they
have yet to find a suitable place for it on the periodic table of the elements
due to the presence of a newly found micro particle called 'Cuton'.
Cutons are naturally found in 'cute' elements such as poofy pillow,
adorable puppy, and fluffy kitten. They are absent in objects such as
fingernails scratching on metal, cow patties, and Howard Stern. When in the
presence of Cutons, brain cells are activated in the officially named
'aaaaaawwwww... sector' of a living creature often stimulating ridiculous
smiling, language reverting to baby-talk, and a constant desire to fuzzle.
Cutonium will bring new hope to ugly creatures as our scientists look for
ways to insert Cutonium into the body safely. Dosage seems to be the major
problem; one of the anonymous volunteers took too large a dose of a Cutonium
injection and turned into a puppy for a whole week. He was happy but the
Cutonium (element 123) was originally going to be called Argon after it's
discoverer but the name was already taken.
||Spacecraft, Trees, and Chat Collide When Well-Known Furs
|| In a landmark event this Monday evening,
Austin, Max, Skanee, Frommer, and Suri gathered in the park. The combination of
all these well-known Spindizzy regulars released a tremendous amount of energy
unstoppable by Ping and Seaweed.
The release of energy caused park topics to focus intensely on the space
program, aircraft, and obscure cultural trivia. This caused Suri, local Lemur,
to think of building a home based around NASA's Launch Complex 19, which Austin
agreed was a fine choice. It is expected that much metal and concrete will be
arriving at the new area. Where the complex will be is not known, but one
possibility is on one of the extreme edges of the map.
In other news, Austin, head wizard, is encouraging everyone to plant trees
around Spindizzy for Arbor Day. Just @create a tree, describe it, and drop it
where it seems appropriate on the map.
||Unusual Smell Noted In South-West Quadrant|
|| A sometimes overwhelming odor has been noted
in a small area of SpinDizzy. Described as 'Sorta smelly', 'Stinky', and
'Ewwww!', it has caused several residents to move out of the area. SpinDizzy's
Public Works Department is looking into the problem and it is hoped that a
forecasted weather front, sending in winds from the northeast, will clear the
The source of the odor is rumored to be a pile of dirty underwear and socks
belonging to @toaded players that had stacked up in the area. No confirmation of
this theory was available at press time.
||Unknown Suspect Puts Depilatory in Fountain|
|| An unknown prankster, apparently attempting
to gratify his bizarre desires to see normally furred creatures without their
fur, replaced the water in the fountain of the Rose Garden with hair removing
liquid earlier this month. Although the switch was noted and corrected by a
maintenance worker, who now has non-furred paws, the implications of this act
Many folks enjoy jumping, splashing, and drinking from the fountain, and
the loss of fur might have been not only embarrassing but dangerous as well.
Luckily, no harm was done by this act. Authorities are investigating, but as of
press time no suspects (Other than the usual group of SED members) have been
questioned or charged.
||Advertisement - Ask Auntie Findra|
As some of you might know, I did a piece for @Action News a while back
called Ask Auntie Findra, where I attempt to answer questions put to me.
Sometimes I even managed to make the answer fit the question. I did! Honest!
There must have been one time? Anyway, what I'd like to do is get -your-
questions that I'd like me to come up with an answer to. Please p-mail them to
me, and I'll get a bunch of them together and post it to the newspaper board.
If nobody sends me any questions to answer, I won't be able to do this, so
the more inane, stupid, or downright incomprehensible the question, the better
I'll like it.
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