Published weekly, because there is always SED news to share
Morticon, Editor
Saturday evening, in the park, Morticon stole the layout for this weeks paper from Argon, local not-too-bright centaur. Argon was foolishly reviewing it out in the open. Morticon took the stolen layout, and rushed over to the publishing room, where he modified it to his liking and hits 'Publish' so that all may see his work. (This was generated in an IC time of about a couple hours. So, it won't be as long or have as many articles as the normal paper. Just SED propaganda. Also, don't take anything personally if your name is mentioned. It's all in fun.)
From now on, the newspaper shall be focusing on the SED, and nothing else. Which is just a slight change from the paper focusing only partially on the SED.
Morticon, leader of SED, receiving much teasing from Argon, well known horse-man, about his supposed 'low IQ' decided to settle the matter once and for all. Morticon went to see Dr. Vladsmishoff, a certified psychologist capable of giving the IQ test. After paying the good doctor his fee and then some, Morticon was administered the test.
The next day, the results came in. Morticon has "...a high IQ...", according to Dr. Vladsmishoff. He also noted that Morticon is more intelligent then "...most centuars..." and that Morticon should be "...studied further. I am intrigued by his mind."
"Finally, I can shove something in Argon's face that says 'See? I'm smarter then you!' Haha!" said a happy Morticon. He also noted that "SED Members can now have more confidence in their leader, knowing he is certifiably smart and can take them into a new reign of evil in capable paws."
Evil is better than good, but it seems hard for some people to understand why. The advantages to Evil are obvious. You can get all the things you want, you can get revenge on your enemies, you can eliminate problems and problem people easily, and your conscious doesn't bother you. In fact taking care of problems when you're evil is half the fun of being Evil. You can steal. pillage, kill and get rid of troublemakers all at the same time. What better way to wile away a hot summer night than by breaking the fingers, then arms, then legs of someone who owes you money and then putting his feet in cement and dropping him off a boat into the ocean? You'll never see you're money again, but he deserves to die for being stupid enough to borrow it from someone evil in the first place.
Of course if you're Good, you can't do any of these things because of your conscience. Good people have feelings of guilt and concern for others, and can't allow themselves to act in ways they know are right, even if the people they briefly consider doing these things to deserve them. When is someone is stupid, a constant annoyance, or owes them money, or has a dog that barks all day and all night for weeks at a time constantly without stopping, they'll still let them live out of sympathy. If you want to be Evil, you can stop being sympathetic and caring. If you're Evil, you don't have to listen to your conscience, or worry about right or wrong, if doing something is to your advantage, it doesn't matter whether it's right or wrong, it's what you want and so it should be done. End of story.
So don't let good people try to convince you that Evil is bad. Good is bad, for Good people never get the satisfaction and pleasure that Evil people do. Good people can't sleep at night worrying about whether they've done the right thing. But Evil people sleep soundly, knowing they have done what THEY want. So being Evil is obviously the only way to be happy in life, and if you're Good, someone Evil will probably make sure your Good, unhappy life is a short one. It's not too late to become Evil and be happy.
Austin's 5 day absence on SpinDizzy this week was not caused by a SED coatinapping, like some have theorized. Instead, a few weeks back, Morticon snuck into Austin's apartment, and planted 'wet bombs'. These little beuties caused the roof to get soaked underneath and finally collapse in on itself. Speacial thanks to Mouser for assisting in the endeavor.
Flutterz is actually a relative of Jar-Jar Binks! Various simularities have been noted in the speech patterns of the fae and the.. alien. Both have denied the simularities, and get quite angry when confronted with them. We'll keep you updated when the DNA results are in.
The entire muck idled to a standstill Tuesday evening as Morticon's latest plan came into play: The first night of the Democratic Convention. Thousands of viewers were instantly hypnotized during the broadcast, including many SDers. They remained that way for several hours AFTER the telecast ended, paving the way for further SED research into [mis]using TV.
Ping is actually a Morlock! Be sure to call him one every chance you get :)
A SECOND SpinDizzy has been discovered. You can see it floating around the first one during the opening ASCII screen. The SED is currently looking into sending an investigative team to the uninhabited SpinDizzy to look into the possibility of taking it over. "I see a good possibility to use the second SpinDizzy as a base for attacking the first one, as well as a springboard to taking over other MUCKs", Morticon said in a recent press conference.
Bored? Tired? Feeling evil? Then have I got an organization for you! The SED! What is the SED you ask? SED stands for Society of EvilDoers. It is an IC organization on SpinDizzy dedicated to causing Evil, Mischief, and taking over the Muck!
What is required of you? It's simple. You have to be evil, semi-intelligent (the higher the intelligence the better), and willing to be a team player. EvilDoing in groups tends to get better results, based on real-world tests.
Since no evildoing fur does things just for the benefit of others, there are benefits to being in the SED. Some of these benefits include a secret hideout, weapons, shinies(money), lab access for those mad scientists, and YES there is even healthcare (see Morticon for details) with a medical AND dental plan!
Some Facts about the SED:
Our editorial policy is to inform our readers of news concerning the folks that populate SpinDizzy, and the events that happen here. We prefer to print stories that are In Character, although Real Life news of players from their Character's point of view, or Real Life events and their effect on our Muck community are welcome. Any events concerning evil-doings will immediatly be printed.
Although, like the SED, our vast network of reporters, stringers, and informants cover SpinDizzy like a glove, sometimes things get by us, or we miss an opportunity to inform you, our readers. We depend on you to tell us not only things of interest to you, but to give us ideas and suggestions to make this paper better. This is NOT YOUR paper, so let us know what YOU'D like to see in it so we can proceed to laugh at it and run it through the shredder.