Argon - Editor
Shinies Invade Rose Garden; Residents Mystified
The Rose Garden was recently invaded by a trio of talking
shinies, according to Mouser, local Fursnake, and Ringo, local
Raccoon. The mysterious brightly-colored objects,
calling themselves the "Solar Talisman", the
"Dark Moon Talisman" and the "Rainbow
Talisman", explained to the Rose Garden regulars (in
between attempts by Ringo to use them as skipping stones in
the Fountain) that they were on a mission to rescue Arkitah,
local sometimes centaur-kin and possible time-traveling
madman. According to the shinies, Arkitah has been
kidnapped by militant Care Bears from another time and space.
The shinies are therefore on a quest to be turned into a
necklace by a normal Care Bear, the result of which somehow
will thwart the militant ones' plans. A discussion on
how one could tell the difference between
militant Care Bears and the ordinary ones and whether militant
Care Bears were a bigger threat than talking shinies lead to
no conclusions. Mouser, however, did learn how to skip
stones from Ringo.
Whether all this is another manifestation of Arkitah's
recurring madness or he has in fact been kidnapped by militant
Care Bears from another time and space has yet to be
determined. Rose Garden residents are advised to take
note should their shinies start talking back at them.
Eocentaur (Part 3)
In last week's SpinDizzy News, Gilead, local otter scientist, described how fossil evidence of injuries proved that Eocentaurs, primitive ancestors of the modern Centaur, were unable to escape predators by running into thick brush, as their Hyracotherium (fossil horse) bodies would otherwise have been adapted to do.
"However, when the lemur part of the body tried to get away from danger its own way," continued the otter, "the results were perhaps even worse for the poor Eocentaurs."
Electron microscope examination of the fossil bones showed clear evidence that their lemur upper bodies were prone to extensive muscle pulls and tendonitis. Gilead belives the pattern of these injuries suggests they were contracted by attempting to climb trees to escape danger.
Continuing with the Good Idea / Bad Idea theme of last week's paper, the accompanying artists rendering illustrates these injuries.
Gilead chirped, "Good Idea: Lemurs climbing trees to escape danger. Bad idea: Lemurs trying to climb trees while carrying the body of a horse attached to their spinal column."
He continued, "While the fossil evidence clearly contradicts this theory, it is tempting speculate that both lemurs and horses evolved as a direct result of an Eocentaur ripping in two while trying to climb and run into brush at the same time. However, this didn't happen, as funny as it may be to see in cartoon form."
More likely, Eocentaurs were forced to evolve rapidly into plains-dwelling runners, relying on speed for escape. Indeed, horses probably made an identical evolutionary change specifically to keep up with their lemur-enhanced siblings. Ultimately, as lemurs evolved into monkeys, then apes, then humans, they made a similar transition, albeit some tens of millions of years later.
This reporter attended the
‘MegaCon’ comic book convention in Orlando, Florida, Friday
to see the goings-on at the event and to verify the geek
quotient that Mavra, fiancée’ to this reporter and local
centaur proclaimed that would be present.
While she was reluctant and too fatigued to attend, this
reporter was able to confirm that there were geeks at the
there was an absence of odor that normally accompanies geeks,
but being comic book geeks, a subtle yet significant difference,
they were well-washed, not wanting their body oils and unwashed
skin to come into contact with an issue of Superman #1.
Even the purchase of comic books itself was possible,
although the sums asked for certain issues were outrageous and
then turned down.
A pleasant side-event that
took place was the signing/autograph session for numerous actors
and actresses from an even larger number of motion pictures.
The most significant ones being June Lockhart, the
‘mother’ in the ‘Lost in Space’ series in the 1960’s,
as well as Mark Goddard and Bob May, who played the roles of
Maj. Don West and ‘The Robot’, respectively. Other attendees were the small in size but huge in capable
acting Kenny Baker, R2-D2’s performer, and David Prowse, the
man behind the mask of Darth Vader.
Finally, the voice talent of ‘Space Ghost,
Coast-to-Coast’, George Lowe, was present, signing many cards
and pictures. There
were other actors and actresses there from other films and
television shows that this reporter won’t further elaborate
To conclude this
presentation on MegaCon, this reporter as well became the target
of autograph hounds, and questions as to what will be happening
in the future with the ‘Hercules’ and ‘Xena’ series, and
whether or not more centaurs would be present in them.
Comments were made as to the quality of the costume as
well as pokings and proddings until this reporter decided that
enough was enough and a hasty exit was made, amidst the jostling
of many a surprised fanboys and clatter of hooves.
After splitting into three pieces, Arkitaur local…
whatever he is, claimed to be on the side of good until it was
learned that he had abducted one of the other pieces of himself
called Seirahlee, a mouse shaped piece of the original Arkitah
and power source.
After hearing that Arkitaur had abducted Seirahlee local
Centaur and Spindizzy reporter Rown (me, Heh!) stepped in to try
and negotiate a release. Arkitaur expressed a genuine interest
in the secrets Centaurs keep since we are all good by nature so
while the negotiations went on Rown dropped a little black box
he had been carrying around innocently and explained that some
of the secrets were hidden in the black box.
Arkitaur produced an evil radio device and spread
pamphlets with gibberish and lyrics to hippie music all over the
place then threatened to turn on the radio and play 70’s
hippie music nonstop 24/7. Of course with many from the 70’s
in attendance that was more or less the promise of a treat
instead of a threat and all waited for the radio to turn on so
they could listen to replays of the Cowsils and ram munchies
down their throats like a pile driver. Unfortunately Arkitah not
being much of an electronics wiz, forgot to put an “on”
switch on it.
Meanwhile, Shoe, who had asked the Centaurs as well as
others to make Arkitaur release Seirahlee, inspected the box
thoroughly before exiting and leaving it open for Arkitaur to
investigate. When he realized that he might learn the secrets of
the Centaurs he entered and was immediately locked inside after
Rown closed the box.
After protesting the evilness of the trap, Arkitaur
finally admitted that he was truly evil. He then threatened to
never let Seirahlee go so Rown decided to leave Arkitaur in the
trap because, after all the residents in the Rose Garden worked
to free it, it was perfectly clear that “Nobody doesn’t like
For a short time Spindizzy was the proud owner of an
Ark-in-a-box till he finally recognized the errors of his ways
and agreed to release Seirahlee as per agreement, Rown opened
the crank on the side of the box and turned it. The tune “Pop
goes the weasel” rang out prophetically before the top of the
box popped open and Arkitaur sprung out.
He immediately went to work deceiving everyone by
draining Seirahlee of it’s power the discarding the remains
with the “slingshot of sorrow”. The amber that was Seirahlee
flew off into the distance while Arkitaur grew in strength.
Arkitaur was then caught off guard by Terra who observed
that he wore Underoos but that was immediately refuted by
Arkitaur who claimed that he wore nothing at all. WemblyFox
thought it looked like a “G” string but Arkitaur claimed
that his skin bent light and he needed no cloths. At that point
Rown then stated that it must be a garter then Argon suggested
slipping a ten spot into it to see what would happen. Turned out
it wasn’t a garter either and Rown was out a ten spot.
legend Chuck Jones dies
ANGELES, California (CNN) -- Chuck Jones, the creator of some of
Warner Bros.' most famous characters, including the Road Runner,
Wile E. Coyote, and Pepe Le Pew, died Friday at the age of 89,
the Orange County Coroner's office said.
The animator died at home of congestive
heart failure with his wife of 20 years, Marian, by his side,
his family said.
"He was never rich, but he was paid enough to ... do
what he loved," said Craig Kausen, Jones' 39-year-old
grandson, who worked with him for the past decade in the
family's art business.
Born September 21, 1912, in Spokane, Washington, Jones grew
up in Hollywood, where he observed Charlie Chaplin and Buster
Keaton while working as a child extra in silent comedies.
After graduating from Chouinard Art Institute in Los Angeles
-- now the California Institute of the Arts -- Jones drew pencil
portraits and sold them for a dollar each on the street. In 1932
he got his first job washing cels, or transparent sheets of
celluloid, in the fledgling animation industry.
"He thought he was going to be cleaning in a
prison," Kausen said.
Four years later, he became an animator for the Leon
Schlesinger Studio. The studio later was sold to Warner Bros.,
where he was assigned to the team that made "Looney
Tunes" and "Merrie Melodies" cartoons. AOL Time
Warner is the parent company of Warner Bros. and CNN.
He directed his first animated film, "The Night
Watchman," at age 25. The six-minute cartoon used 5,000
Later, he moved to MGM Studios, where he created new episodes
for the "Tom & Jerry" cartoon series, co-directed
and co-wrote the full-length feature "The Phantom
Tollbooth" and directed the Academy Award winning film,
"The Dot and the Line."
In his 60-year career, Jones made more than 300 animated
films -- including the Peabody Award-winning special "Dr.
Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas" -- and won two other
Oscars, according to his Web site.
"Animation isn't the illusion of life; it is life,"
Jones once said.
Whatever the technical quality of the animation, Jones felt
character development was the most important element in any
piece, according to Kausen.
His grandson said the animator had no regrets about some of
his now controversial portrayals of certain ethnic and racial
groups -- including World War II-era films depicting Japanese
with buck teeth and a small black boy named "Inky" who
lived in the jungle.
"He looked back and said that was part of the
time," Kausen said. "He wouldn't agree that is
appropriate not to show them, because it is part of history. ...
He never portrayed anybody as a lesser of a person."
Two years ago, Jones set up the Chuck Jones Foundation to
encourage the proliferation of classic animation and art and
provide promising art students with scholarships and grants.
A memorial for the animator is planned in Newport Beach, said
a statement from Linda Jones Enterprises, a company run by
Jones' daughter, Linda. Private services will be held for family
In addition to his wife and daughter, Jones is survived by
Editor's Note: With the number of SpinDizzy residents who
owe their existence to, are based on, or enjoyed the work
of Mr. Jones, or inhabited a place called Toons Fur and
Fluff, I expect many will feel a tug at their hearts as the last
representative of an era and style passes on. Now it can truly
be said, 'They don't make cartoons like they used
But imagine the cartoons they'll have in Heaven!
asked in this week's survey, "I'm doing a survey to be
published in @Action News. The question is, 'What
would you do if you could travel back in time and change
|Arkitah says quietly,
"I would travel to the middle ages and take this kid
away from his father, the king. Then I would tutor him and
make him King, so that he could bring chivalry and order
to the world. Of course, this would be order from my point
of view, and I would teach the young king everything he
|Alex says, "Make sure that I
exist or otherwise I'd....*pooof*"
"Dangerous question, any kind of tweak might render
us all non-existent."
"Muse would make it where furries ruled the world.
n.n" to you.
|Salem pages, "I
would prevent Abraham Lincoln from getting assassinated."
"Prevent the Norman conquest of Saxony :)"
"That's easy. I'd interfere with evolution and make
Wallabies the dominant species the world over."
"i would write the chronicles of Nikoli Tesla."
"If I could travel through time, I'd take my notes
and the best computer I could get my paws on, then give
them to me 10 years ago. =^.^="
quietly, "I'd warn Abraham that his so-called god was
an evil demon that would cause untold suffering and
misery.Then *I'd* be his god, instead, and cause untold
suffering and misery!" "
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