Argon - Editor


Thanks to you Vets for what you've done for us. Both Furry and not!

ewswire Sources Alicia Vulpnine Killed In Tragic Accident
  This week, Alicia Vulpnine, local Kitsune was killed in an as yet unexplained crash.  Several residents of SpinDizzy, responding to a bright flash seen near RP Central, found a large crater and what appeared to be a robot at it's bottom.  Mouser, Boki, Reiter, Rown and Argon, arrived to investigate the flash, and discovered that it wasn't a robot in the crater, but a 'Gundam' suit.  Closer examination revealed that Alicia was inside it.  More like wearing it as the whole thing wasn't much taller than 6 feet.

After figuring out how to remove the helmet, it looked grim as Argon could find no pulse.  A strangely glowing pendent fell from around Alicia's neck, which Boki laid immediate claim to.  After fooling around a bit, (None of the folks were Gundam fans and really had little idea what the standard protocol was) a lever was found which released Alicia from the suit.  CPR was started at once but to no effect.  Just as it became obvious that Alica could not be saved by those present, a computer generated voice emanated from the Gundam indicating that the pendent, which Boki had laid claim to, contained Alicia's 'essence' and that if returned to the lab in her dome, it could bring Alicia back through a clone there.  Boki graciously gave the pendent back, and the group transported Alicia's body to her dome. Argon laid Alicia's body next to the clone, and he and the others were told she had some chance of recovery.

Reports of Alicia, or her specter have been rumored but as of press time, no further information has been available.  Condolences may be made to any of Alicia's many heirs.

Eris C. Local Spirit Grants Wishes
Thursday, November 8
Time: Past your bedtime
The place: The Rose Garden
In a surprisingly feat of versatility, I, Eris Connolly, everyone's *favorite* dead girl, embarked on a quest to become a different supernatural entity entirely, a genie! Making my home in an empty Coke bottle (only after it had been rinsed out, mind you) I was summoned by local centaur, Argon, and thereby granted him three wishes, such as they were. Having no formal genie experience, I made no promises as to the actual wish-granting capabilities I had. But it was worth a try anyway. And I had nothing better to do that evening.
Argon's first wish after having summoned me from the Coke bottle was selfless, granting Cye her wish of no longer being 50 feet tall. I suppose that was a really nice thing to do, and it turned out rather well. The wish actually came true, and Cye was resized to a much more reasonable height.
At this point, several other suggestions were made to Argon concerning what he should wish for. For his second wish, it was given to local Jellicle, PatchO'Black, who wished he "was married
to a beautiful Jellicle cat." Seeing as this was already true, it was a pretty easy wish to grant. No sweat. Two down, one to go.
The final wish proved the most vexing, as Argon couldn't make up his mind. Having been warned by movies and television that vast, world-changing wishes tended not to work very well in the end, Argon instead wished that there was a VT200 compatible MUCK client with a spell-checker and timed auto message sending. This final wish was granted with minimal difficulty, but being bound by the letter of the wish, he never actually said he wanted it or could
use it. So for the PC-using centaur, he received the exact client he described, in Macintosh format.
Rown Morticon's Banquet

     The unbelievable has finally happened. After years of failed plots and senseless mayhem Mortician, Spindizzy Wallaby and evil SED leader, pulled off the heist of the year. A daring scheme conceived and executed flawlessly by the master of SED himself. How could this have happened?

     As has been tradition in SpinDizzy for the past couple of years, Morticon held his yearly banquet inviting all from SpinDizzy to come and indulge in a myriad of foods and drink. This year was no exception but unlike previous years Morticon invited Suri, local Lemur and SpinDizzy regular as well as budding poet to recite her latest poem about him entitled, “Wallaby Mort!”

Wallaby Mort! 

He's brown, and short.

And he'll sell you a Lemur, if you give him a kwort...


     All were treated to her wonderful poetic verse while they supped and as a surprise Suri recited another new poem too. Everyone loved her wit and free verse as well as her metered second poem,  “Pointy pointy Wallaby”.

Pointy, pointy Wallaby!

Has a pouch, but's still a 'he'.

Stick a kworter in his ear...

Get a Lemur, never fear!

     After everyone attending applauded Suri, Morticon turned everyone’s attention to the food and drink asking all to get their fill and even take what they wanted with them when they left. After everyone did then he directed our attention to the door to exit and thanked everyone for attending.

     Once out the door though, we were dropped through a trap door that placed us all together in a dungeon room where Morticon demanded we turn over what we were carrying to him. Then he demanded everyone say “I obey Morticon” to be released. Unknown to him or his SED probe, everyone crossed their fingers behind their back when they said it making the gesture null and void and taking away at least one little victory from Morti. 

Rown Culinary Delights At Morticon's Banquet

     This year’s banquet with Morticon was once again the apex of culinary dispensation. There was far more food than in previous years so the opportunity for me to try the different types made it a very interesting evening and I have my results of the banquet ready for you to cross your palette with.

     The food was catered by SED catering services, a division of SED international and run by Morticon who admitted he was too lazy to do the cooking this year.

     The appetizers were the usual hors d’oeuvres with a few stuffed jalapenos and blooming onions thrown in as well. As appetizers go, they didn’t do much for mine, of course when you’re my size one tray of hors d’oeuvers  just don’t cut it and the servers wouldn’t bring me any more trays after I ate the first one.

     Now we come to the entrée. There was a variety  of meats, vegetables and fruits to suit even the most temperamental of digestive tracts. Between helping my plate dodge the nonstop attacks from Mouser, I had little time to sample all of them so I’ll have to go by what other’s reactions were to the food.

     Turkey: Mouser ate whole legs without chewing and lived.

     Beef: Mouser ate whole slices and didn’t die.

     Ham: Mouser.

     There was no mutton. Either Morticon couldn’t catch the sheep or he was related somehow. :-p

     Vegetables included the usual succotash plus potatoes, carrots, peas, beets and Morticon’s favorite Artichoke.

     Weedy munched on the greens available and even with her sensitive equine digestive tract she fared very well making the greens safe territory for the rest of us.

     Several health inspectors were looking into the possibility that Salmonella was in the potato salad but Morticon assured them that old Sal was in the Spindizzy lake swimming with the fishes. He made certain of it himself. Of course the inspectors were employees of SED and immediately accepted Morti’s explanation. We all avoided the potato salad.

     Fruits came from all over the world and Suri ate her fill of them. She’s still alive so I’m assuming they were okay too.

     Wines covered the entire spectrum of the cheap table variety. Morticon did make certain that I had my favorite served to me though, Merlot. Unfortunately it was SED brand and a very poor version too. I didn’t die so it’s safe to assume it was okay, just cheap. 

     All in all it wasn’t a bad meal but the price was way too high as we all found out afterwards. You could say that we were “fleeced”.

Argon Weekly Survey
  Argon asked in this week's survey, "I'm doing a survey to be published in @Action News.  The question is,  'Is Daylight Savings Time a good thing, or should the clocks be left alone?"
Tarka says, "Leave clocks alone!"
AlexRaccoon speaks, "Clocks should be set back and left there. "
Rown says, "We have enough setbacks in life, why set the clocks back too?"
Mavra says, "I'll say... 'set the clocks either one-half-hour forward or back, then leave them alone'."
Twohart says, "Ouch. And leave them the clocks alone."
Flutterz doesn't have a clock. O.o
Cye says, "I think it's a good thing. Hasn't hurt anyone yet. Try living in Newfoundland where they put back the clocks 2 hours one year.."
Mouser hisses, "They should abolish time zones completely and go back to local solar time, the way it was 100 years ago or so. With computers these days you don't need to worry about time conversion tables anymore. As for DST, it should be abolished, and the work day should be fixed starting at local sunrise. It's about time people got back to the planet's rhythm..."
Alex says, "I'm from a deep space colony. DST means nothing to me!"
Stars'_Pyre telempathy-sings, "I think we should make crystal clocks that measure precisely the tick of the universe."
Argon The Doze Garden

@Action News Info Guidelines and Procedures for Submitting Articles
  Submitting a story or artwork for @Action News is easy!  Just send it to newspaper@spindizzy.org, or qmail or page Argon about it.

Most any type of story or article will be excepted.  Generally, we'd prefer things that aren't out and out lies or flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of SpinDizzy. Things that occur in public areas are fair game. The things reported don't have to have actually happened, (Any more than anything that happens here does.) but make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of interaction that we have.  These are pretty broad guidelines, but we expect good sense to apply.