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Zoie injured

Raccoon.(Strangely, Zoie was not found in her usual tree lately, since it was recently knocked down. Notes for an article were discovered beneath it, apparently for the newspaper, which we have decided to run this week, even in its unfinished state):

"As Morticon and Luaie were discussing ideas, Luaie mentioned that if he had a team, they would be called the "Collateral Damage Force" with Morticon mentioning the SED is so effective that they drove the good guys out of business.

"PatchO'Black commented that the SED were so ineffective that the good guys have not had anything to do of note. Morticon then launched his plan with the "lack of good guys" about. Luaie mentioned that his group would stop the SED while causing massive property damage with Morticon saying they would cause it first.

"As the argument continued, Luaie whipped out out a make-shift jail (made from an old refrigerator box). Morticon playfully mocked the jail, and Luaie mockingly knocked over a branch. At the time, however, no one noticed this was my usual tr.." (Zoie's notes end at this point. The following are from eyewitnesses.)

In an attempt at one-upmanship, Morticon knocked down a tree. At the time however, no one noticed that this was Zoie's usual tree. It was moments later that everyone in the garden heard a shriek as the tree went down. Some jumped behind knocked over picnic tables to hide, while others rushed to the tree itself. Zoie was found unconscious and seriously injured, but with an uncharacteristic show of guilt, Morticon took Zoie to a medical facility. The paper understands that she will not be able to finish this article this week, but would like to print what we managed to recover.

Zoie Hospitalized

Ambulance.Zoie, local raccoon, was recently hospitalized when the tree she was in mysteriously fell to the ground. Zoie suffered multiple fractures and a concussion. Morticon, seeing no one else was helping her, took her quickly to the SED HQ to help her heal. "I expect Zoie to make a full recovery in time," Morticon stated, "She'll be back to her raccooney self in no time."

All well-wishers may pmail get well 'cards' to Morticon, and he will deliver them to her. As she gets better, visitations may be allowed.

BunnyHugger attempts to change perception of "Devil Bunnies"

Devilbunny.Recently Spindizzy had an invasion of devilbunnies, or to be more correct, A devilbunny named Bunnyhugger. Devilbunnies are mysterious and misunderstood creatures, so Spindizzy @Action News recently interviewed Bunnyhugger to set the record straight about devilbunnies once and for all.

Bunnyhugger explained that devil bunnies are like regular bunnies except that they're more intelligent than normal rabbits and possess amazing reflexes as well as sharp claws and teeth, adding that some devil bunnies have a special chemical in their saliva that enables them to bite a human and turn him into a devilbunny. This they use to increase their number and help spread their ideas to all corners of the globe.

Some devilbunnies are born, but Bunnyhugger revealed that she was born a human then captured by some devilbunny scientists, turned into a devil bunny and brainwashed into following their secret plans. She worked for a while as a propagandist, broadcasting the good news about "The Guiding Paw" before having a change of heart and escaping. "And so then I was ashamed to be a devilbunny for a while. But now I've sort of come to terms with it and accepted that I can be a devilbunny but still be good and moral."" she is quoted as saying.

Like any Spindizzian, Bunnyhugger has heard of the SED but as she puts it plainly, ""Siince they're about evildoing, I have to say that they must be my enemies. I'm a moralist and I have no time for evil."

Bunnyhugger was coy about her future plans, but it's assumed that she is here at Spindizzy to stay and to live in peace.

Classic Gaming Article

Atari 2600.Here is the lil 'coon once again!

This time I plunge into a very cute SNES game that made a cooperative effort between two gaming giants of the time: Nintendo and Squaresoft.

This brought Mario into the field of RPG.

openingsmrpg.You start off, once again rescuing the princess from Bowser. Part way through the battle with Bowser, a HUGE sword split Star Road and smashes into Bowser's keep! You are flung from the caslte and into your home. From there, you learn the little tricks of teh game from Toad and your journey continues.

mariobarreljumping.Along the way, you meet little Mallow Nimbus, prince of the land of Nimbus, who's emotions could make it rain or sunny. As you continue your journey, you deal with many dangers, even a barrell ride down the river until you meet with Frogicus, Mallow's adoptive grandfather whom will guide you through the game.

genowhirlsuccess.You also meet along the way a doll, who when infused with the power of a citizen of Star Road, becomes Geno, a very powerful warrior with a rocket hand.

As you go along your journey, you slowly begin to realize that you must collect the various star pieces of Star Road. Soon, you run into the reminants of the Bowser Troop as he tries to regain his fortress, with each meeting show less and less of his troops until there is only Bowser himself, standing in front of Booster's tower. At the same time you and he try to bust the Princess out of it. After beating Booster at his "creative tower" of puzzles, you soon have to chase the two to prevent a bad marriage (with a great scene if you finish quick enough).

axemrangers.Eventually you have to break into Nimbus Land to save Mallow's parents and face the Axem Rangers . Afterwords, King Nimbus allows you to use the bus (a cloud bus) to invade Bowser's keep.

I won't go much further into it to keep a bit of the story hidden. However, following with the traditional Squaresoft heros. Mario is silent except for major decisions. Any other communicaitions are spoken through sceneing and transforming into various characters. This game is filled with comedy and emotion. You can bring up your team to each challenge by either going all new (Geno, Mallow), pure power (Geno, Bowser), pure magic (Mallow Princess) or the dream team (Geno, Princess) or the traditional (Bowswer, Princess).

This game is filled with action, puzzles and yet it is simple enough for beginners to get into and challenging enough for the die hard players and enjoyable period! It is still considered one of the top 4-5 RPGs and in the top 10 of the best games for the SNES.

This game is also filled with cameo characters from various other mario and other games as well (From Birdo and the Sniffits and little models from F-Zero). Booster also seems to be the very beginning efforts for a rival for Mario... Wario (though this is only a rumor).

Well, I'm gonna wrap it up for now before I head out to peek in the garden so take care all.

Zoie, the Mario/Princess/Bowser team chooser


Stop the presses!Thank you to everyone who contributed to the newspaper!

Special thanks go to:

The various sources for the information about Zoie,
The SED for additional information about Zoie,
Ba'ar for the interview with Bunny Hugger,
Zoie, for her "Classic Gaming" article,
Patch O'Black, for his "Four Kolor Kitty" article,
Gilead, for his puns,
Ba'ar, for his his survey and
Argon, for this week's cartoon.

Four-Kolor Kitty: Let Me Play Among The Stars, Pt. 1

Supercat - Patch O'Black (Art by Chanspot).Greeting, fellow stargazers! This time, the ol' Four-Kolor Kitty is taken us on a tour of some of the alien worlds in the DC Universe! Now we all know that Superman comes from Krypton, and the Martian Manhunter comes from, well, Mars, but there are a host of other planets that fill up to skies. Let's take a look at a few!

126.jpgFirst, we will look at the homeworld of Hawkman, Hawkwoman, and Hawkgirl. A little place called Thanagar. Back in the Golden Age of Comics, this world was a technological marvel, with no problems such as political unrest or poverty. There was no need for police until an alien race started stealing just for the fun of it. To combat this, they established the Hawk-Police. Two members of this police force chased a shape shifting criminal to Earth, where they became Hawkman and Hawkwoman! In more reason retellings, Thanagar became an expansionist government and a police state, taking over other planets to "protect" them. Thanagarians lived in floating cities, while aliens were forced to live in ghettos on the planet surface. When Hawkman and Hawkwoman came to Earth, they stayed because they didn't wish to serve the corrupt police force.

238.jpgHowever, if you want to see a true group of galactic protectors, go to the world called Oa. This is the home of the Guardians of the Galaxy, who created the Green Lantern Corps. Located in the center of the universe, it was a lifeless planet, covered with deserts, where the sectors that the various Green Lanterns patrol go out from like spokes on a wheel. A huge base has been constructed on the surface, with the Central Battery that powers the individual "lantern" batteries that in turn charge the power rings of the Green Lanterns. More recently, the planet has been enclosed in an armored structure to protect Oa from outside attacks.

336.jpgSpeaking of the Green Lanterns, another planet associated with this group is called Mogo. Introduced in the story, "Mogo Doesn't Socialize", it is revealed that this planet is actually a sentient being, and since his mass and gravity would cause all sorts of problems if he tried to visit other worlds, he doesn't make many of the meetings on Oa. However, while Mogo can't come visit his fellow Green Lanterns, many have come to Mogo. Since Mogo can control his weather systems and geography, he can be very accommodating to visitors, provided they don't pollute or try to strip-mine his resources.

432.jpgFor our final world on this trip, we will look to the home world of the alien warrior and lovely female alien Starfire. She hails from the planet called Tamaran. This world used its scientific genius to make it a tropical paradise. However, they were attacked by a group of aliens known as the Citadel, and after being betrayed, the Tamaranians were forced to give up their princess, Koriand'r. The princess was then subjected to experiments, and when she gained the ability to create "starbolts", she escaped, came to Earth, and joined the Teen Titans. By the way, Tamarians, in addition to being able to fly using stored solar energy, have a unique ability. They can learn languages through physical contact. Starfire originally learns English by kissing Robin. She could have, say, just shaken his hand, but she had a crush on the Boy Wonder at the time....

Time to pull the interplanetary tour bus into the station for this week! Remember, if you would like us to visit a topic or answer your burning comic book question, just page #mail PatchO'Black. Until next time, see you in the funny pages!

Gilead's Horsing Around Puns

Q: Why do stallions have harems?
A: They're "maremon" fundamentalists.

Q: Why couldn't the horse abuser speak in his own defense after he was found on the stable floor, kicked unconscious?
A: He had had a frog in his throat.

Q: Did you hear about the horse abuser who was kicked so hard he wound up in orbit?
A: They call him a saddle-ite.

Q: Why couldn't the rider get his tired horse to go into the city?
A: It stalled almost as soon as it got into the barn.

Q: What do you call a bunch of musical striped equines?
A: ZebraZebra Top.

Q: What do you call an anonymous someone you consider a moron, if you're being politically correct?
A: A Jack-or-Jennyass.

Q: What did the blacksmith do on the planet with no horses, but giant insects?
A: Spent his days sitting around shoeing flies.

Q: Did you hear about the mare who defended herself against burglars while giving birth to twins?
A: She pulled out a pair of colts and scared the burglars off.

Q: Did you hear about the baby horse who fell into an oyster?
A: They pulled him back out in time, but he'd become a pearl-handled colt.

Q: Did you hear about the mare who had trouble relieving herself while pregnant?
A: They had to insert a foal-y catheter.

Q: How do stallions get the birthing room ready when too many of their mares need it at the same time?
A: They put some extra leaves into the birthing table, and grab some foaling chairs out of the closet.

Q: How did the horses hail the King when he learned to ride with a gentle hand on the bit?
A: "Long may he rein!"

Q: What does a horse do when he has a really bad heroin habit and freebasing just doesn't do it for him any more?
A: He starts manelining it.

Q: Why do horses fear Ethernet?
A: The thought of 128,000,000 bits per second... *shudder*

Q: What did the mare do when her foal was told he was too short to go on his favorite ride?
A: Lent him a hand.

Q: What did the kindly bronco do when the cowboy told him he really needed to win the rodeo to get his mare a life-saving operation?
A: Spotted him a few bucks.

Q: What did the dandy say when he brought his Phaeton wagon in because his current team of horses was too tired to go on?
A: Filly 'er up!

Weekly Survey
Ba'ar doing the survey.Hi all, here's your @Action News survey for this week.What would be the plot of 'Spindizzy The Movie'"?
  • Tuesday says, "I think that the main plot would be about the fall of Squirrel City, and all the other stuff would be subplots."
  • Toledo answers, "Let's put it this way: Jerry Seinfeld would sue for stealing his idea."
  • Shoe barks, "Would probaly involve Morticon's evil plot and I might be in it. Besides that I'm not sure."
  • Astra squeaks, "I'm thinking... an hour and a half of me sitting on a park bench without doing anything in particular."
  • Argon says, "Well, of course it would star centaurs. Evil monsters invade and threaten skunks, squirrels, raccoons, foxes, ferrets, bears, coatis, bunnies, dragons and all sorts of the residents of SpinDizzy. All use their own special talents to defeat the monsters. After the monsters are turned to bacon, all the heroes go to the Rose Garden to celebrate by idleing for hours! The sequel would involve a comedy of SED out takes."
  • PatchO'Black mews, "I think it would be a plot of nice roses, Ba'ar."
  • Natasha smokes an entire pack of cigarettes to get her voice properly raspy. "In a world... where everything is isometric... ONE MAN... can plot it. SPINDIZZY. Coming this summer to theaters everywhere."
  • Zoie mmms a bit,"The sub-plot would be an election between Morticon, Argon and Findra with the main plot being the chase for Raccoon tail.. which became a high price delicasy.
  • Borris Gruffs, "Morticon, the Incompetent Wallaby!"
  • Kern says, "Oh well there's only one story to tell! All about from how the rechronastic undisperculator got worn up the one time and had to find a flock of hummingbirds to fly in and keep the winds from getting too far under the water where they would just never do before the Firebird was able to set out the differential gear!"
  • Austin says, "I think it would be rather like 'Santa Claus', Ba'ar, only with a less intimidating Pitch the Devil."
Doze Garden Cartoon

The Doze Garden Cartoon.
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