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Monolith appears in Rose Garden

The Sentinal.

A strange object was seen in the Rose Garden recently after the passing of author Arthur C. Clark. Well known on the planet Earth, Clarke was a human science fiction author and visionary. As the link will further explain, Clarke was known for his idea of geo-stationary communications satelites and other predictions of scientific advancement among humans.

One of Clarke's best known short stories was, The Sentinal, upon which 2001: A Space Odyssey was very loosely based. Again, follow the links if you are unfamiliar with these tales from Earth.

Strangely, as news of Mr. Clarke's passing reached SpinDizzy, an excavated monolith similar to those in the movie appeared in the Rose Garden with the exact proportions of 1 by 4 by 9 (the squares of the first three ordinal numbers). The monolith was a mystery to many but those familiar with Mr. Clarke's works, and his passing, recognised it right away.

According to Mr. Clarke, such monoliths were placed by some ancient alien civilization to encourage emerging intelligences and help them make the next evelutionary leap. Why one would be placed in the Rose Garden was a mystery. This reporter asked Andros, local fox spaceship commander and contact for a galaxy wide civilization, if any such monoliths had been found other than in the Sol system and on SpinDizzy. Andros was unaware of any others being reported.

A theory casually mentioned to this reporter seems to have merit. It is well known that raccoons are a very ancient and wise race. It has been proposed that the intellegence and advances in evolution the monoliths start are not so much to make humans, and SpinDizzians smarter and advance their cultures and scientific knowledge for space travel, but to use that knowledge to feed raccoons.

Details of the monoliths find some similarities between them and raccoons. I have been asked not to reveal these similarities, nor has @Action News been given an explanation for the amount of work and wakefulness needed to create and place these monoliths in light of modern raccoons' avoidance of both. However it is undeniable that where these monoliths have appeared, raccoons have lived long and prospered.

The more observant of those who observed the monolith noticed a prediction made in another story by Mr. Clarke, The Nine Billion Names of God.

Chalky gets his wings

Chalkey, (Well, sort of.)From a previous encounter inside Beltrami's 3D-BB, Jake, local cybernetically enhanced kangaroo-rat, left with neon green cheeks caused by Chalky.

This time it was time for revenge. After asking Beltrami, who sat on top of the monolith, Jake leaped into the 3D-BB. He wrestled down the dragon, tickled it and drew jet-engines below his wings, and a controll panel on it's back.

It took a while for Chalky to get used to his new extensions. After that the two flew around inside the 3D-BB.

After a while Beltrami, local balloon princess and major of SpinDizzy, had to go. She drew a stack of mattresses and Chalky eventually landed there. Then she pulled out Jake and had to go.

Bear Hibernates, not!

Hibernating bear.As spring dawns upon us, melting away the cold and the snow of winter, bears everywhere are waking up from their long winter sleeps.

There is, however, at least one bear that spent the winter wide awake. "It was too mild for me to hibernate." Ba'ar, local bear, is quoted as saying. "Besides who wants to spend all winter sleeping when there are good friends to share the time with, not to mention the various fall and winter parties."

Not only has Ba'ar spent this winter awake, but he says he hasn't felt the slightest inclination to hibernate. "What can I say? I'm an active bear." he chuckled. "Life's too short to spend 4 or 5 months of each year sleeping soundly, or very nearly so." Smokey the Bear and Yogi the Bear, both brother bruins, could not be reached for comment on this.

Classic Gaming Article

Kid Icarus Title.Hey Everyone! Its your lil raccoon again! Here I go again with this week's new article.

This time, I was "inspired" by a video on YouTube. Here it begins, you see Mario and Kirby starting to fight, followed by a myriad of other events and up above, in the clouds, you see the subject of my article... watching the battle unfold with a sudden explosion of darkness. Then you see a green haired goddess issue him a bow as he heads down into the battle.

However, the game I just mentioned is not my article. The one I am talking about came out in 1986 in Japan and 1987 in the US. The game I am talking about is...

Kid Icarus

According to the story, in Angel Land, it was once ruled by two goddesses, Palutena, the Goddess of Light and Medusa, Goddess of Darkness. Due to Medusa's cruelty, Palutena changed her into a monster and banished her into the underworld. However, Medusa refused to go queitly, she gathered an army and overran Palutena's army and imprisoned her. Medusa then taken the three treasures, The Wings of Pegasus, the Mirror Shield and the Arrow of Light, then giving them to her three strongest minions.

Kid Icarus Begining.Palutena, sealed away, used the last of her strength to send Pit, a young, yet gifted, angel that was sealed in the underworld, her bow, and freed Pit. Then begins Pit's own adventure and mission, to escape the underworld and confront Medusa!

Kid Icarus Reaper.On your way, you face such enemies as the Reaper, if they see you, they send out a tune to call forth its minions to hunt you down. As you go further and reach the first fortress, you run into the Eggplant Wizard, who will turn you into an eggplant if you allow it to touch you.

Kid Icarus Ground.There are four sections of the game itself.. The underground, The ground level, The ascent and the Sky Palace itself. At the end of the first three sections, you will run into a fortress where you must defeat certain bosses and retain the Treasures of Palutena. Before each of these battles, you can try to free the trapped Centurions to aid you in this battle. Be VERY careful because this as well as other factors can affect the "multiple" endings!

Kid Icarus Final Level.Upon your gathering each of these treasures, you set forth into the Sky Palace itself in full flight and armor. At the end of the nightmarish stretch you face Medusa herself!

While using your shield to reflect her shots and using your Arrows of Light to pierce into her eye while avoiding her snakelike hair, you eventually defeat her and save Palutena.

Now upon how well you performed, how many times you needed to do this as well as how many centurions and other items and score during your travels, Palutena assigns you a new rank. The best one being what his present form is in the Super Smash Brothers Brawl game, plus you get a very lovely kiss from the goddess herself.

Kid Icarus Ending.I really really want to get my hands on the Brawl game and a Wii to play it on. I never been much of a PvP gal, but I so want to get my hands on that cutie and beat em up with his bowsword.

I can't help myself.

Though this game was released the same time as Metroid, yet it holds a large amount of nostalga for many, especially the intro theme as well as the one for the start of the underground.

The below are the theme of the Theme, Underworld and Sky Palace ripped by Flying Omlette:

  • Title
  • Underworld
  • Skypalace

Well, enough of that for now. I shall end this with a small question.

As many of you know by now, I really came into my own as a gamer with the NES.. I am wondering if I should start to edge into the Playstation/N64 worlds since the PS3/Wii/Xbox 360....

I await your answers.

Zoie, the fallen angel raccoon.


Stop the presses!Thank you to everyone who contributed to the newspaper!

Special thanks go to:

Argon who explained the monolith in the Rose Garden,
Ba'ar for telling why he doesn't hibernate,
Zoie for her "Classic Gaming" article,
Patch O'Black for his "Four Kolor Kitty" article,
Gilead, for his puns,
Ba'ar for his his survey and
Gilead and Argon for this week's cartoon.

Four-Kolor Kitty: One Year Anniversary!

Supercat - Patch O'Black (Art by Chanspot).Greeting, folks! Back in the beginning of March of 2007, Argon was looking for new articles. I popped up with an idea for jotting down some thoughts on comic books. Thus started this little bit of silliness called Four-Kolor Kitty, I thought it might be nice to look back on what we've covered in the past year.

First, I want to thank Argon for including my ramblings in the @Action News. I would also like to thank Chanspot for the wonderful drawing that has lead off each column. 124.jpgThe first column set up that I would be asking for questions and suggestions for topics from readers. While this has been rather hit-and-miss, and lately it has been more of my own invention. However, we started off strong with Austin asking about a rather silly bit of equipment used by the Legion of Super-Heroes. This became a nifty little article regarding some rather ridiculous gadgets.

235.jpgAnother memorable early article was about Jimmy Olson and how he had gone through some rather memorable changes over the years. Oh, the memories of the cub reporter changing into Giant Turtle Man Jimmy Olson! Sometime, we will return to look in on some of Mr. Olson's more memorable misadventures...333.jpg

When the latest Spider-Man movie was in theaters, we took a look at the Web-Slinger, then we looked at his funny animal counterpart, Spider-Ham! The ol' Four-Kolor Kitty has always been a big fan of the wall-crawler.

We've looked at the history of the various incarnations of Robin the Boy Wonder, super-hero transportation, crime-fighter's forms of communication, and the longest series of articles dealt with alternate universes and crossovers between DC and Marvel. Those are perhaps the articles I am most proud of.

429.jpgOf course, we still kept things light, with such articles as the one about the Legion of Super-Pets, and when we looked at the various restaurants in the DC Universe. We would also look again at the Legion of Super-Heroes to see who didn't make the cut. Of course, anything from what was known as the Silver Age seemed pretty ripe for the picking when it came to look at the funny side of super-heroes.

524.jpgWhat will we see in the coming year? Well, that depends on you, the readers, of course. As it was said in that first column, the topics should come from suggestions and questions from the readers! Of course, should there be a lull, I'll keep plugging along, but hopefully folks will chime in on subjects they would like to see covered. Otherwise, I have no choice than to subject you to my own "tastes" in topics! So, until then, happy anniversary, and see you folks in the funny pages!

Gilead's Otterly Terrible Puns Dedicated to Hasani Otter (2006-2008) and Woody Coati (1991-2008)

Q: What's the grossest kind of fox?
A: The fen-ick.

Q: What do you find in the leg of a prosimian?
A: Its femur.

Q: What do you call a prosimian who broadcasts music on the internet?
A: A streamur.

Q: What hops around and slaughters its enemies?
A: A warllaby.

Q: What hops around and casts hexes on its enemies?
A: A warlockby.

Q: What pack-dwelling large canid has pointy ears and opposes Sauron?
A: Welves.

Q: What flies around silently at night and grabs mice in its nose?
A: An owliphant.

Q: What kind of mouse supports Barak Obama?
A: HoPing.

Q: What is Patchy's Cat basket?
A: His loiter box.

Q: Where does a baby long-nosed procyonid get milk?
A: His mom's coudder.

Q: Where does a baby aquatic mustelid get milk?
A: His mom's utter.

Q: Who rules the procyonidae?
A: The racking and racqueen.

Weekly Survey
Ba'ar doing the survey.Greetings all, Ba'ar here with your Spindizzy @Action News survey. Assume that one of the Spindizzy rabbit community moonlights as the Easter Bunny. Which one do you think it is?
  • Austin says, "Oh, I imagine, then, that it's Roofus_roo, outside her clever disguise."
  • Ba'ar growls, "I think it's Findra."
  • Anthea only knows one full-time rabbit, and that's Flossi.
  • GrumpyBear grumbles, "Skyler."
  • Zoie giggles,"Findra. She's the only bunny I know"
  • PatchO'Black mews, "While Leslie is cute enough, I think it is Findra!"
  • Astra squeaks, "I vote Leslie!"
  • DTF smiles "Findra."
  • Borris Gruffs, "Da, Findra!"
  • Billybob chuckles, "Don't look at me none. Ah ain't yer East'r Bunny.'
  • Kefan snickers. "How do you know the Easter Bunny's really a bunny? It could be a cunning disguise so he or she can live out the rest of the year in peace and quiet!"
  • Kit_Skyfire lays his money on Morticon. I know Morticon is a wallaby, not a rabbit, but they look similar, and it would be great cover for him."
  • Argon says, "It's actually the raccoons who hide the eggs! As to where they get them, who knows?"
Doze Garden Cartoon

The Doze Garden Cartoon.
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