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Morticon loses "Y" chromosome

Morticon, local wallaby found himself less of a "man" this week due to an accident. Although having a pouch had called this into question previously, it was found to be appropriate that he had one as circumstances ensued.

As reported in an eariler edition of @Action News, Tzolkin, formerly local mousecat, had become an art dragon. Dragons are sometimes found to be magic users and Tzolkin found that as a dragon, magic was part of his new form. As Tzolkin's gender has been questionable, even by the newly formed dragon, it is unknown if he is a she or vice-versa. As her dragon form seems more curvey and feminine than his mouscat form, for the purposes of this article, I'll refer to Tzolkin in the feminine tense.

During the last week, while drawing figures in the air, for reason unknown, Tzolkin flicked one towards Morticon. When it struck the wallaby, he found herself to be female. Although with the same dark black fur and spikes, she, like Tzolkin, became more curvey. Unlike Tzolkin, Morticon, who now goes by the name, Morticia, became more cuddly and nice.

Recently, while a group were at the Cash Creek Casino, Morticia arrived and was just as friendly and snuggly as she could be. She even gave her self proclaimed "arch enemy" Argon, local centaur, a hug! The crowd was suprised by her friendliness and somewhat enhanced by her feminine appearance. Some noted that at least her pouch fit her form.

As of Friday night, Morticon showed up in the Rose Garden back to his normal gender. Explaining that the "Rune" that Tzolkin had accidentally created had stuck to him and made him female, had been transfered to Darius. As of press time, Darius was still female.

Centaur pun-fest

The following exchange took place in the Rose Garden this week:

Kefan is downloading a Tom Baker episode of Doctor Who. Woo!
Argon says, "I saw that on TV this morning and about cut myself shaving."
Kefan says, "Woo Who, in fact!"
Argon says, "Who?"
Kefan says, "Yes!"
Argon says, "Yes? Close to the edge, down by the river..."
Argon says, "Who was Tommy."
Kefan says, "Tommy Baker was Doctor Who, yes."
Argon says, "He was in both bands?"
Kefan says, "No, Ginger Baker was never in The Band."
Argon says, "Which band?"
Kefan says, "The Band."
Argon says, "The high school band?"
Kefan says, "I'm sure they were in high school at some point."
Argon says, "Did he play Sousa?"
Kefan says, "I suppose. Sousaphone *is* some pretty heavy metal."
Argon says, "The tuba is the Black Sabbath of metal though."
Kefan says, "From now on, I shall call the tuba an Ozziephone. XD"
Argon says, "He was a wizard of it."
Argon says, "He was the wizard of ozziephone."
Kefan says, "You know, I should have guessed that he was Oz-trailian..."
Argon says, "Could be, his music was koala than most rock in its day."
Kefan snrks. He's out.
Argon says, "Fine interplay though."
You hipbump Kefan!
Kefan hipbumps Argon! Argon hipbumps Kefan back!
Kefan says, "That played like a 'Whose Line' game."
Argon nods.
Argon says, "Fine material for the paper." Kefan says, "Oh, dear..."

Gilead's Con Report FC2007

It was a whirlwind FC this year, or more exactly whirlpool, with all the tears streaming down everyone's eyes because I couldn't make it.

The art show was wonderful as always, although a persistent theme this year seemed to be that everything looked like just a swirl of tear-distorted colors and shades. The Gilead Appreciation SIG had to be cancelled , and the Iron Artist event had to be rethought at the last minute to use tears as an ingredient, because they'd be getting all over everything anyway. The sound problems that plagued the main stage events were traced after the con to tears shorting out the sound system and everyone's radios.

Vixie was known to have been a huge star, and left the stage to much sobbing and applause. The applause can be definitively attributed to Vixie leaving the stage, although the sobbing may also have gotten worse at that time than it had been due to me not being there. And fursuiting events were amazingly well-attended, since the abundant tears soaking everyone's fursuits tended to rinse out the sweat that usually filled them.

The new Plushie SIG turned out to be quite popular, with many people taking comfort in curling up in a fetal position, cuddling an otter plush, holding a security blanket, and sucking their thumbs as they sobbed, wishing Gilead was there.

All in all, it was a great FC, and I hope I can be there again next year. And that's the truth.

Furpent saves Neopolis from cashing in!
Gets key To City, handshake from mayor, free drinks


What started with one rat and a big dream turned into several thousand rodents clogging the streets, slouching on street corners, and keeping business up all night shoving paperwork, dice, and chips at the new downtown Cash Creek Casino. City services were at a standstill, chiefly due to mysterious break-ins and misappropriation of the muck's splash screen. That's when Mouser, local furpent, stepped in.

Following the mysterious disappearances of casino manager Big Veto, and his assistants Vinnie, Lefty, Little Veto, and Joe 'more is good' Carlyle, Neopolis officials announced today that new arrangements have been made with property owner Annon the salesrat, who is now promising "More gambling, with fewer gambles!" Annon, a prominent salesrat who serves on the directing board of the Underworld Bank was unable to stay for press interviews, stating he "had to run" and hoped to get a few minutes head start.

Spindizzy Mix Up!

Below you will find the names of some of Spindizzy's most prominent citizens. The problem is that they're all scrambled up! See if you can unscramble them. (Answer key in next week's @Action News.)

1. nrago

2. arrgmpyueb

3. noocitrm

4. vaarm

5. nikzltko

6. infdar

7. paiort

8. bllbbyoi

9. dansor

10. ororofous

Gilead's Pouch of Puns

Q: What do you call a joey when his mom's milk ferments?
A: Pouch Drunk.

Q: What do you call a small, drunk kangaroo?
A: A wobbly.

Q: What's green, has two antennae, and wants to take over Australia?
A: Mars-Supials.

Q: Why did the flyer spend so much time grooming her baby before the big kangaroo beauty pagent?
A: She wanted a showy joey.

Q: What comes from space, duplicates kangaroos, and then kills them?
A: Macro Pod People.

Q: What do you use to view kangaroos?
A:A: A Macropodscope.

A: What marsupial discovered China?
A: Macro Podlo.

Q: What do you call a strangled joey?
A: A Jon Bennett's Wallaby.

Q: What is the most punctual marsupial?
A: A Timer Wallaby.

Q: Why do kangaroos have trouble going a short distance?
A: If something is only a hop, a skip, and a jump away, they can only do the hop and the jump.

Q: What's a boomer kangaroo's favorite sports team?
A: The Philadelphia Flyers.

Q: Why are kangaroos' pouches prime real estate for joeys?
A: They're all practically a womb with a view.

Q: What do you call a movie about a kangaroo composer who finds joy in teaching joeys about music?
A: Mr. Holland's Macropus.

Weekly Survey

Ba'ar Greetings all, Ba'ar here with your Spindizzy @Action News survey for this week. How close are you to your player in terms of attitude and temprament?

  • Ba'ar growls, "My player is me only without the benefit of a bear fursuit. 'Nuff said."
  • Miss hmmms. "My player's public persona? Not at all. But I'm quite a lot like how my player is behind closed doors."
  • Argon says, "I and my player are the same in attitude, temprament and appearance. What you see here is what you get in real life."
  • Tzolkin intones, "Oh, my player and I are very much alike. Though I don't know if we would like one another if we met."
  • Andros says, "My character is more confident in public than my player is."
  • Natasha says, "My player is exactly like me. My player is really female. And really a coati. And really a cartoon character. Really."
  • Than ummmmms... "Me an' my player bouncy, got lotsa energy, we like lotsa fun games! We both like the ocean an' the beach, an' ice cream an' candy!"
  • Ceredwyn says, "My player and I are closely linked as far as attitude and behavior is concerned. Though I am obviously an idealized reflection of what my player would like to be, I still tend to react to things in the same way as he would do in the real world."
  • Jac says, "I sometimes think we are one in the same, but then there are times that it lets me cut loose and relax as only you can if you let the silly train take over.
The Doze Garden
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Editor - @Action News