@ Action News

Argon -- Editor

Please don't forget to read the bulletin board. Enter +read from anywhere.

Morticon Presents SED Fireworks Show

In what has become an annual SpinDizzy tradition, Morticon, local wallaby and alledged leader of the Society of Evil Doers, gave a Fourth of July fireworks show.

As the sun set, Morti set off a dazzling display of fireworks. Filling the sky with color and smoke. Amazingly, unlike in years past, Morticon didn't cover the observers with a net and steal their money, or some other nefarius plot. Perhaps being a "wallataur" has reduced his criminal tendencies.

After Morti's fireworks show, Kinsor, local fruitbat, continued the show with some fireworks of his own.

Everyone enjoyed the shows, and had a great time. Photographs of the fireworks (Done in ASCII art and rendered as text for quick downloading) are on Page two.

Gilead Becomes Tentacled Otter Monster!

Gilead the otter has four meachnical tentacles growing out of his back! He says that it's okay, though, just the result of an accident trying to make fusion that ended up fusing. He says "I figured that since a tiny fraction of a percent of the water I swim in is made of tritium oxide instead of ordinary hydrogen oxide, it'd be a natural job for an otter scientist. :-)" It happened he said because "I ate some eels over the blueprints, and mistook a spot of soy sauce for an extra 0, so I miscalculated." (He says eels are the tastiest food ever.) It didn't hurt any, though. "It was kind of fun. Like fireworks, only bigger."

The tentacles like him but they are artificial intelligences, so "sometimes they have a mind of their own." They poke around and scritch and hug and tickle and everything, and are really good hugging people. Gilead doesn't know if they can detach or if he could add more without breaking his neat streamlining when he swims. He says also even though he has eight legs now octopuses don't like him because they know he's a predator.

Gilead says it's different having tentacles now. "When I hug around the Rose Garden, I really hug around the Rose Garden!"

Light in Sky May Be New Planet

Firework sightseers were intrigued by the large and bright star observed in the sky above SpinDizzy during last week's fireworks display. Using telescopes from the nearly Fruitbat Observatory, astronomers have discovered this new star contains several planets, at least one of which that seems optimally placed in order to sustain life.

"It's a bit far of a distance to see clearly from the observatory yet," says researcher Steck Fruitbat, "but we intend to contact a reputable space agency to do some closer research for us on planetary conditions. The star's characteristics themselves are remarkably like SpinDizzy's own, leading us to believe this new star may be artificial in origin."

Zoo Visit

Morticon?.Phoex, local Vulpine, and Gilead, local Octter (usually otter) went to Phoenix Zoo today, to look at the phoenixes. Unfortunately, they had combusted in the summer heat, and were waiting for cooler weather to rise from their own ashes. However, a good time was had by all, including the local Fennec, African Spot-Necked Otters, Spectacled Bears, Raccoons, male Coati, and at least one Wallaby.

Phoex and Gilead spotted Morticon among the group of Wallabies, or at least they think it was Morticon, based on his behavior and cuteness. One of the keepers had to chase said Wallaby away from his conspecifics, because he was bullying them away from the mist sprayer they were using to keep cool. Providing further evidence of the identification, the wallaby cursed the keeper, put on a SED hat, and hopped off in a huff.

SpinDizzy.org Who's Who Listings - SpinDizzy FAQ

I just thought I'd again remind everyone that there's a Who's Who page on our website.

I'd like everyone to send me a picture of their character, and a short blurb about yourself. The images and blurbs from the old site weren't carried over. It seemed best to re-build that page from scratch, so I need another copy of both your blurb and picture sent over again. Just e-mail them to argon@spindizzy.org and put who's who in the subject line.

Also, I'm working on a SpinDizzy FAQ page on the website. Already I have sections concerning Frequently Asked Questions about the SED, the centaur community, and the Art Ambush. I'd like to add information about the Neo-Republic, the balloonie community, Jellicle fields, and other groups and information new folks might need or be interested in.

Please send information to me at argon@spindizzy.org with FAQ in the subject line.


Darla plans Derby!

Darla the centaur said Friday night she had a fun idea for all the centaurs--the First Spindizzy Derby. It'd be a race around for the fun of it and all the centaurs or centauroids would be invited.

Darla said everybody would need jockeys and she already had hers picked out, the vixen Elissa. Argon wondered why a centaur would need a jockey and she said "those equines that run in the Kentucky Derby have to have them, and since we are part equine ourselves I don't see why not."

Argon said it sounded kind of silly and agreed with Jabari the lion who said that was the fun. Darla agreed, that was exactly why, "The silliness of it." Argon remarked it would be fun galloping under low branches with Tarka the otter on his back. Leslie said they could run it by running around Cye's hat.

Annon the rat wondered if they might joust instead, but Darla pointed out that might get somebody hurt. Everybody agreed there were probably enough centaurs or centaur-oids or people who are sometimes centaurs to play. Jabula said the winner would be "the centaur of attention."

Austin Doesn't Notice Turning Into Balloon

Austin, the bunny ear-nose-tailed coati, was found on Friday morning to be a balloon, made of latex rubber and filled with regular air.

Remarkably, Austin had to be notified of this by Skyler, the cartoon bunny, as Austin had no idea when he changed. Onlookers had doubts that a person could be a hollow polymer shell maintaining shape by balancing gas pressure with the outside world, but Austin insisted such was the case.

Skyler and Austin began speculating as to how it might have happened. The balloon transformation was identical to that given those who use the Balloon Construction Kit in the Rose Garden, offering this hypothesis. Austin had created a copy of the Balloon Construction Kit for Ceralor, balloon dragon, and Kiyoshi, toy dragon, for their Balloon Fields (S4 W6, the current 'park'). "I'd almost certainly have tested it once it was put in, and I must have forgotten to untram it."

Austin has since reported a feeling people were pointing at him and snickering. He was comforted to learn that Mouser, fursnake, had a similar problem in which he had somehow been transformed to a vinyl copy of himself, and was unsure just when or how to change back. It did gain him popularity with Beltrami, half-dragon balloon.

Balloon Fields remains open all day, every day, with patching services, transformations, and the popular chocolatex candies for any visitors.

Guardian Angel 'Roo

Roofus Roo, local Kangaroo, showed up this week with a new form.

Roofus' life of trying to do good for others was paid back, thanks to the help of a kind angelic guardian, who offered her the chance to be one herself. It's quite clear she accepted, and now she will be able to do good beyond the wildest fantasies of her mortal self. With white fur, beautiful wings, and a golden halo, she looks very angelic.

She's kept her pouch, and long tail, and her 'roo feet wear soft slippers. Not that she needs them, as, in this form, she floats! Roofus is about as gentle of a guardian as one could ask for.

Roofus has been a little shy about showing off this form, so next time you see the 'roo, ask him to show it to you. You won't regret it!

Ping Gets New Clothes to be Girl Mouse

Nikon the little raccoon lended Ping the mouse a bag full of her spare clothes this week, and helped Ping into a blue dress. Ping needed them because a couple weeks ago, "Tarka [the otter] found an evil device in the depths of the SED that changes someone's gender. It got used on me, and then got broken. I'm *still* not used to this..."

Ping's had trouble finding nice clothes she can wear, and didn't have a lot of variety. Lamar the rabbit tried finding some doll clothes, which made Ping say "Barbie is evil." Nikon pointed out Barbie's way too tall for Ping anyway. But Nikon's clothes should work better, since they're a little big, but not as big as the Barbie clothes.

Nikon suggested Ping should try some less tomboyish clothes if she's going to be a girl, and even the dress was a little formal. So she gave her a brand-new outfit with a knee-length purple skirt and a short green T-shirt that shows a little fur around her waist. Nikon also tried giving Ping cheese-scented perfume but she wanted to try lavender instead. Nikon also gave her a necklace and a ring, and offered earrings if Ping gets her ears pierced. She's not sure how she'd look with more jewelry on.

Gilead's Otterible Puns

In space, nobody can hear Otterrible Puns. So they arrive typed.

Q: Why don't we have deer on our $.25 coins?
A: Because then everyone would be grabbing our hind quarters constantly.

Q: What should you do if your otter swam 3,000 miles?
A: Get him an eel change.

Q: What should you do if your otter starts swimming to the right all the time?
A: Take him in for an eel ignment.

Q: Why don't seals wear their school logo?
A: Because Phoca U. could be taken the wrong way.

Q: Where do you go to buy wolves at wholesale prices?
A: The Were House.

Q: What do you call a huge ghost with a prehensile nose?
A: An elephantom.

Q: Why couldn't the wallaby hop fast?
A: His 'roo matism was acting up.

Q: Where do fish make iron into steel?
A: In a floundry.

Q: Where do they get the iron?
A: From a smelt er.

Q: How does an otter keep his fur from falling down?
A: He fastens his pelt buckle.

Patch O'Black Gets Check-up

Beltrami used her operator pack to scan PatchO'Black for health. Her report estimated his overall health at 98 percent of ideal, with the note his right wrist, voicebox, and tailbone showed signs of stress. She was unable to explain the source and PatchO'Black is not aware why they are damaged. They will monitor his health in future and try treatment, though Beltrami is inexperienced with solids medicine.

Beltrami's operator is a general-purpose tool with scanning and alteration capabilities.

Trouble on the Horizion

(Retrived via Subspace by Becky)

Even though the war has been over for some time, local militant uprisings have been reported in the outer colonies where the militia has thin control on law and order. Since the formation of the Republic, these uprisings and disruptions have been rather sporatic, no real pattern involved. It was just as of recent during the period, where the Grand Council will have a roation of members, that these disurputions have become in such a pattern. More starships have been sent out to the outlying colonies to try and stop the uprisings before it becomes a disurpution to the inner colonies. For protection to the Queen and to deter any other assassiation attemps, the 1st fleet has been dispatched to patrol the area around Spindizzy. This should not affect life on the small planet island however since there are outstanding orders for any ship NOT to land on Spindizzy.

Puns of MUCK-Wide Proportions by Casimir and Ba'ar

Ba'ar and I took on every wizard's name, and when we went through those, started on everyone else from SpinDizzy. Hope you enjoy!

Ba'ar growls, "It's Raccoon day !*YAY!*"
Royce yays!
Casimir grins at Royce, and cheers!
Casimir wonders if there's an official logo?
Ba'ar growls, "Ask Royce."
Casimir looks at Royce, "There an official logo, Royce?"
Royce hmm. "Not that I know of, really. Something ringy, I'd imagine."
Casimir chuckles.
Ba'ar growls, "Or something Shiney."
Casimir grins.
Royce nodnodnods.
Casimir had wondered if it was a Rols?
Ba'ar growls, "OUCHIES!"
Ba'ar growls, "Rols Royce!?!?!?!?!?!?!"
Casimir eeps?
Royce grins.
Casimir chuckles.
Ba'ar growls, "You're just as a punster as I am Casimir."
Casimir says, "You Ping so?"
Ba'ar growls, "I couldn't FINDRA a worse one."
Casimir couldn't, but you did, and there was much Peppermint! (merriment)
Casimir says, "The Skyler's the limit."
Ba'ar growls, "Oh geez!"
Casimir has always lived in fear of being attacked by transformers and Morticons.
Ba'ar growls, "I think you're trying to (Morti)CON me."
Casimir sniggers.
Casimir says, "Austin I do it? (Oughtn't)"
Ba'ar growls, "I think you're too far (ar)GONE for that one."
Casimir says, "Sounds like a MAV(ra) on your part!"
Casimir says, "C'mon, tell me the Ba'ar (bare) truth!"
Casimir says, "Shouldn't we be LOGaning this?"
Ba'ar growls, "I don't think so."
Casimir grins.
Casimir noses, "Y'didn't pun, Dar(l)win."
Darwin grins.
Casimir nosewriggles.
Ba'ar growls, "I guess that's because you were NIMBLE and ROSE to the occasion."
Ba'ar growls, "It sets my heart all a FLUTTERZ"
Casimir says, "JHEN I'm just going to have to stand up to you!"
Ba'ar growls, "I think you're jsut pulling a NIKON on me."
Royce wanders. He can't Ba'ar it any longer.
Casimir says, "Say you'll take the GilLEAD?"
Casimir giggles.
Casimir logs it...mind us sending it to the paper this week, Ba'ar?
Ba'ar growls, "No go ahead."
Ba'ar growls, "Even though my punning has been PATCHY at best."
Casimir says, "Hope you don't Lamar-ent it."
Ba'ar growls, "That would TARKA a long time."
Casimir says, "Your wit puts me in quite a Spikey position!"
Casimir says, "But I liked those cakes you made, mind Brongarring some over?"
Casimir says, "Or do you think I'll chanSPOT your deviousness? :)"
Ba'ar growls, "You still want to blow the ROOF-us off with those puns eh? (ini)GO ahead."
Casimir is impressed with your punnery. Pray tell they'll not send ye to the nunnery?
Ba'ar growls, "Why? I've been as quiet as a MOUSER all night."
Casimir says, "Let's not get Violet!"
Casimir says, "But I hope I've earned your ADARA-ation?"
Ba'ar growls, "GI-NO(t) yet."
Casimir votes we stop here, and I'll cede if you Darius, if only because the log is getting mighty long!
Ba'ar growls, "THIS MEANS WAR-USA."
Casimir arrrgh's!
Casimir says, "We hold those truths to be self-evident!"
Ba'ar giggles "That's enough, I think."
Ba'ar growls, "You're a champeen punster."
Casimir bows, and fears it has met its match!

Timesheart has birthday!

Timesheart the tiger Care Bear Cousin had a birthday Saturday! He got a lot of congratulations and even ordered a Care Bear cake for himself and celebrated turning 41. Annon the rat gave him a videotape, "Hooked on Phoenix" to celebrate and Mouser the fursnake sung "o/~ This is your Birthday Song, it isn't very long... o/~"

When he's not having a birthday Timesheart helps Brightheart Raccoon run the caring meter in Care-A-Lot. It's a lot like a clock and measures how much caring there is in the world too.

Even More Puns (Ing and Kern based)

Argon (Who was in his Peter Potomus balloon form at the time,) vents, "Oh yes, Kern will have the best chance of seeing Ing. Kern has 'The Ing State of Mind."
( Bird-like but not a bird. )
Aishae sultrily sibilates, "So, the spinning of the windmills of his mind have an Ing- lish on them...?"
Skyler grins. "You might say that."
Aishae sultrily sibilates, "Thought I just did."
Logan facepalms, "Punny time."
Argon vents, "I hope the gears of its mind have plenty of Ing-nertia."
Aishae puts her well syndicated bottle of Punny Vapors away.
Aishae sultrily sibilates, "Or that they last for a while, if the metal of the gears were made of the right Ing- redients."
Argon vents, "I'm sure they're wear-Ing well."
Aishae sultrily sibilates, "Hmm... does the mechanism wear the gears, or do the gears wear the mechanism?"
Argon vents, "Depends on what its wear-Ing."
Aishae sultrily sibilates, "I guess we aren't seeing them, because they're ing- rossed in something?"
Logan says, "Don't you mean, don't even th-ing-k about it?"
Aishae sultrily sibilates, "Ing- rates."
Austin heeheees.

The End.

Nikon and Wulphe are sisters!

Nikon the miniature raccoon and Wulphe the wolf-centaur told everyone this week that they're really sisters! Nikon's the big sister and Wulphe the little. Nikon's always been small and while Wulphe is big, sie can be small thanks to Nikon's ability to shrink people. They didn't say how big their mommy and daddy were though.

Interview With Firewind

Adara purrs, "Hi Firewind!"
Adara purrs, "Ready for an interview?"
Firewind says, "Oh, hello there. Um, I guess so."
Adara takes out her pad and paper.
Adara purrs, "OK...so, about how old are you, and when did you first arrive at Spindizzy?"
Firewind says, "I'm not sure. I don't remember when I was born, probably forgot from all of the times I messed up playing with magic. Same with when I first got here."
Adara purrs, "'Messed up with magic'? What did you do?
Firewind says, "Random stuff I felt like trying. I'm a curious fox, sometimes too curious."
Adara chuckles.
Adara purrs, "Do you have a career here? Does it involve magic?"
Firewind says, "Not really. Magic is just something I like to play with. As for a career, I'm head of a forming organization."
Adara purrs, "Are you at liberty to say what type of organization is being formed?"
Firewind says, "Actually, I am. Its called the FOB [Forces Of Balance] and was 'originally' designed to be an anti-SED org. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it now that the partner in this places creation might now be coming back."
Adara raises an eyebrow, "Really? I think that's just the thing Spindizzy needs! Just for those reading the paper who may be interested, how would someone who's interested in this organization find out more about it?"
Firewind says, "They'd have to come and see me. They might also be able to get something out of my little bots too."
R/Ccamera6 rolls towards Firewind and stops next to him.
Adara pats the camera.
Adara starts on a new piece of paper, "How and why did you first come to Spindizzy?"
Firewind says, "Well, I heard of it from a recently passed person called Butterfluff. *sniffle* I thought it would be a neat place to be at after the fluff got done telling me about it."
Adara purrs, "What kind of things did Butterfluff say that made you want to stay?"
Firewind isn't quite sure now. He forgot that from time and the failed magic.
Adara ahhs, "That's OK."
Adara purrs, "What places do you frequent?"
Firewind says, "Hmmm, what places do I frequent? *thinks*"
Firewind says, "Well, I'm usually here, or at home. Sometimes you can find me in the rose garden...that's about all I can think of off the top of my head.
Adara purrs,"That works."
Adara purrs, "Well, thanks for taking the time to chat with me. I enjoyed it!"

Bearing Up

Ba'ar.Welcome to latest edition of Bearing up, the advice column where Ba'ar (That" s me!) has answers to your most challenging questions.

Dear Bearing Up,
If I step on a crack will I break my mama's back?
- C. Ment

Dear C. Ment:
No but you'll break your own back when you lose your balance and fall.

Dear Bearing Up,
My gutters are full of leaves, Who can I get to clean them?
- Itsy Bitsy Spider

Dear Spider:
Roto Rooter will do the job well.

Dear Ba'ar,
Which is a better investment, salmon or honey?
- Argon

Dear Argon:
Neither, GOLD!

Dear Bearing Up,
Is the Thunderbirds movie going to be any good?
- Falcon 7

Dear Falcon 7:
Yes. It'll be the movie of the year right along side the Garfield Movie and the remake of Around The World in 80 Days.

Remember possums (to steal a term from Dame Edna, if you have any questions,please page mail me (Ba'ar) online or send mail to big_bear@operamail.com. Thanks.

Newspaper Circulation Report

@Action News, SpinDizzy's weekly paper, apparently has a fairly healthy circulation, so we figured we'd show just how healthy it is.

Each week, as long as there's room. I'll show the 'hit graph' for the @Action News website.

Graphic of @Action News website hits.

Weekly Survey

Argon doing the survey.This week, Argon asked, "I'm doing a survey for @Action News. The question this week is, "What actor made the worst movie ever?"

  • Millicent says, "Bella Lugosi - Plan 9 From Outer Space."
  • Aurentihyndera thinks for a moment. "Sean Connery for Zardoz." Wherever did the pocket dragon see that?
  • Elissa ums to Argon. "I don't know.. I do think the animated version of _Lord of the Rings_ is pretty awful though."
  • Ray turns back to Argon. "Well, there's WORST, like, 'Robot Monster,' Or, 'Plan Nine From Outer Space,' but those can be amusing. I was, however, particularly offended by a recent moive with high production values, 'Van Helsing,' with Hugh Jackman."
  • Ba'ar growls, "My answer is Gina Phillips and Justin Long in Jeepers Creepers"
  • Tottle chuckles. "Bela Lugosi, Plan Nine From Outer Space"
  • Kinsor -- "Jar Jar Binx! Though I'm not exactly sure he was acting... if he was he wasn't doing it very well!"
  • Gina_Doberman says, "Robot Monster!"
  • DaemonNuit says, "Wendigo. Or The Habit (something like that) THat was the worst vampire movie I ever saw."
  • Alicia says, "Ohh...Kung Pow"
  • Logan squeaks, "Uhhh...That one that made that really bad movie?"
  • Casandro says, "Ohh, I see. So I guess then there's "Brad Pit" for beeing in that movie about sweating greeks, or Tobey Maguire for that cheap adaption of that comic, I guess you could go on for ever."
  • PatchO'Black mews, "Ahr-nold in 'Batman and Robin'....."
  • Austin says, "Argon, I'm going to go for an unconventional choice and pick Don Ferrara of 'Racket Girls'."
  • Darius says, "I'd have to say Death race 2000, with stylvestor Stallone."
  • Beltrami writes down: 'JAN-MICHAEL VINCENT'
  • Mouser hisses, "Paul Newman in 'Quintet'. I doubt seriously if anyone here has seen that..."

Notices and Corrections

Large RP Event

Thanks to everyone who took the time to 'vote' on my Large RP Idea!

For those of you who wanted to be a part of the planning group, please qmail me with days and times next week that you'd be available for a meeting. Thank you!

(By the way, if you didn't vote and still want to be a member of that planning group, page me (Adara) anyway - the vote was just like a general headcount!)

Thanks again!"


The Doze Garden

The Doze Garden Comic Strip

Guidelines and Procedures for Submitting Articles

Submitting a story or artwork for @Action News is easy! Just send it to newspaper@spindizzy.org or qmail or page @Action or sdnews about it.
@Action News is published weekly on or after 12:01 AM Eastern Time on Sunday. Most any type of story or article will be accepted. Generally, we'd prefer things that aren" t out and out lies or flames about other folks, and have a basis in the reality of SpinDizzy. Things that occur in public areas are fair game. The things reported dont have to have actually happened, (any more than anything that happens here does) but make sure you don't overstep the social boundaries and rules of interaction that we have. These are pretty broad guidelines, but we expect good sense to apply.

Thanks! Argon, Editor @Action News