2/5/2001  
Newswire Centaurs don't know about wives' tale
 
         A recently leaked SED research paper indicates that SpinDizzy's local centaurs have never heard of the old wives' tale that claims you can change hairs from a horse's tail into snakes by leaving them overnight in a jar of water.  The newspaper staff is baffled as to why the SED should be investigating this phenomenon, or what it may mean to the local centaur population.
 
         An attempt was made to question Mouser, resident fursnake and quasi-ophidian, as to the meaning of this report.  He declined comment, saying he is still trying to figure out the difference between horse tails and centaur tails.
Kulan Wallaby and Devilbunny duct taped together!
 
         Tuesday in the park, Max, local wolverine, in a surprise move duct taped Morticon, local evil wallaby, and Lamar, devilbunny, together.  Morticon's tail was duct taped to one of Lamar's feet, creating a considerable problem for the wallaby as well as the devilbunny.
 
         After much grumbling, threatening Max, and the inability to get Gratiot, local thylacine, to find a suitable tool to cut the tape, Morticon walk-hopped back to SED Headquarters where he apparently found the right tools and freed himself from Lamar.  No word yet on retaliation or other SEDish methods.
@Action News Newspaper to be published on the web only
 
         Due to the voting results of whether or not to publish @Action News on the MUCK as well as the web, @Action News will continue to be published only on the web.  The staff does not see much point in making the extra effort to make a MUCKed archive, based on the following voting results:  Two furs voted yes, two voted no, and two didn't care, for a total of 6 furs.
Argon Coati Escapes From Garbage Disposal
 
         Austin, local coati, was a bit suspicious at the idea of a free bubble bath being offered by a tele-marketer for a two week, no cost trial.  However, because he'd been feeling a bit tense, an unusual state for an elastic coati, he decided to take advantage of the offer.  He waited for the installers to appear at their scheduled time.  Austin expected several installers and a truck to show up, so was a bit surprised when a somewhat scruffy looking fox arrived with a small valise.
 
         After introducing himself, the fox told Austin the installation would be done in just a few minutes.  In light of Toon Physics and 'magic', Austin accepted the idea and invited the fox in.  Austin told the fox he wanted the bath installed on the deck, but the fox headed straight for the kitchen and began putting water in the sink.  Austin said the fox was quite the salesman, and before he knew it, the fox had filled the sink with water and bubbles and convinced him to give it a try.  After Austin had climbed in and relaxed in the warm water, the fox reached in, pulling the drain plug and flipping on the sink's garbage disposer!
 
         Austin's quick coati reflexes had him out of the sink as soon as the plug to the drain was pulled.  The fox, heading towards the door as the gravity of his situation occurred to him, left no clue as to his intentions or his reasons for this unusual act.  The only evidence left behind was the bottle of Softly Eliminates Dryness bubble bath.  As of press time, no arrests have been made.
Frogar
The Doze Garden

 

@Action News Info Guidelines and Procedure for Submitting Articles
 
>> Procedure for submitting an article:
 *  The newspaper building is located at Role Play Central (rpc).  When you
enter the building you will see a bulletin board.
 
 *  Go ahead and 'write' your story.  If you decide you don't want to write
one, hit .abort and forget about it.  Otherwise page 'newspaper' alerting
us that you wrote one when you finish pasting it in.
 
 *  An alternative to this is to page #mail newspaper with your story OR
 
 * We will edit it and tell you where you can look at it to make sure it wasn't mangled.  You can then p #mail the editor involved saying that it is ok.  Otherwise, suggest changes that should be made. If you trust the editors feel free to put something to the effect that you pre-approve the editing in your rough draft.
 
 * That's it!  It'll appear in the paper!
 
>> Guidelines for writing articles:
 
When writing articles for the paper...
 
 * Try and do some proofreading before submission.  That means spell check!
However, if you're no good at that sort of stuff, just send it as-is and the
editors will try their best.
 
 * No articles whose sole purpose is to flame someone.  You can use the SpinDizzy BB for
that ;)
 
 * Please strive for accuracy.  If they have time, the editors may check up on some of the quotes and perhaps the basic facts of the article.  Otherwise, it is assumed you did your best to write an accurate article.  If this is abused and inaccurate things are complained about, stricter rules may be put in place.
 
* Submitting your article anytime on Friday evening through the normal publishing date (Saturday night) will usually waive your right to review the edited version because of time constraints.  You will be contacted and informed but if you cannot get on before the publishing deadline to check your article it will be published regardless UNLESS you specify otherwise.
 
 * The editors' decisions are final.  This is not a wiz ran paper so do not
complain to them.  We can be reached by paging 'newspaper'.
 
 * Just about anything is published, so be creative!  It can be IC views on
RL topics, RPs that occurred around the MUCK, or most other things you can
think of.  You have creative license when it comes to documenting RPs, so
feel free to expound on the action, etc.  If you aren't sure if a story is
acceptable, page 'newspaper' and find out! :)
 
 * The AUP applies, so keep language and content acceptable.
  The End