Happy New Year and stay safe, from the staff of @Action News!

Kulan Shine Wolfnapped in SED Scheme!
         Shine, local wolf, was captured earlier this week by Morticon, evil wallaby and leader of the SED.  When asked how Morticon managed to capture a creature much bigger then him, Shine answered, "Well, he kinda asked me to hold out my paws so that he could kidnap me."  Shine had no answer when asked why she allowed him to do that.
         Morticon then dragged Shine to the abandoned piggy bank, where he first was using her as a hostage, but then after Vassily, local sloth, wandered in looking to thwart evil, she became a bargaining chip for some sort of wand and manual.  Vassily traded the wand and manual for Shine, and Morticon left.
         Vassily then told Shine that letting Morticon tie her up, "was not a safe behavior to engage in.  Gave the standard hero speech about safety and left, since I couldn't think of anything else."  This is also one of the few successful SED plots and, "a hint of things to come," said Morticon.
Argon Impromptu Birthday Party Thrown In Rose Garden
         This past Wednesday a surprise party was thrown for Max, local Badger, in honor of his birthday.  It all started with an @shout by Seaweed, local Sea Otter, 'Seaweed shouts "Ok, everyone wish Max a happy whelpday .... :)"'  After the realization set in among the Rose Garden crowd that Seaweed meant Birthday and that a celebration was forthcoming, folks began offering Max best wishes.
         Seaweed then arrived and handed out party hats and noisemakers to the group. The party got into high gear as fun was had with the hats. Seaweed managed to arrange her hat into a Unicorn horn, and Suri, local Lemur, wore one over each of her ears.  Steve, local 'Toon Squirrel, upon seeing this suggested that Suri was now half Vulcan and half Lemur, which Suri denied vehemently.  Maxl, local Badger, offered congratulations to Max on being closer to the grave.
         Morticon, local Wallaby and alleged leader of the SED, made a brief appearance to wish Max best wishes, and then returned to his dastardly deeds elsewhere.  Seaweed also served birthday cake, more of which ended up on the celebrants than in them due to the inherent 'toon physics in force at the time.
         During the celebration, Max only grudgingly admitted that only due to some obscure depositary of public records was there any proof that today was in fact his birthday.  None the less, he seemed to enjoy the party as did the rest of the folks.
Argon Make Friends And Influence Folks With @sdesc
         Tired of fading into the background in a crowded room?  Want to draw attention to yourself, well deserved or not, and let others know more about you than just your name and species at a glance?  Then use @sdesc, or the 'Short Description' command.  It's easy to set up, and can lead to hours of fun and confusion.
         Rather than seeing, for an example, 'So and so enters carrying this and that' while using the 'ride' command, @sdesc allows you to set up a short message, so that (in my case) you'll see "Argon, a white, Clydesdale based Centaur, enters carrying Such and such." If you were to set your @sdesc, in place of 'Such and such' it would read whatever you entered, instead of simply your name.  @sdesc also works with many other commands, so let's go through how to set it up.
         Decide on what you want your Short Description to say.  It doesn't have to give your name or species, but the program will automatically add your name in brackets if you don't use it somewhere in the description.  Let's, for example, say you want yours to read, "Shinera, a loveable Raccoon".  All you have to do is enter:
@sdesc Shinera, a loveable Raccoon

         You can make the message read anything you want, of course.  If you wish to clear your short description, enter '@desc' on a line by itself.  Keep in mind this works with most 'look' type commands, but not all.  For instance, it displays using the 'mumble' command, but not 'mutter'. MPI can be used, if you are so inclined.  So, give @sdesc a try and have fun!

Argon Goldfish-Koi Hoped-For Prize In Food Chain Standing Debate
         Mouser, local Fursnake, and Seaweed, local Otter, were seen in the Rose Garden this week nearly fighting over Tatagoi, local Goldfish-Koi. It started as Seaweed arrived, taking note of Tategoi, assumed that he, being a Fish, and she an Otter, that the dinner bell had been sounded.  Tategoi, taking exception to being Seaweed's meal, used magic to defend himself.  Whether this successful defense was a result of properly used magic or the fact that Tategoi was in a fishbowl  which, in her rush to enjoy the fish, Seaweed failed to notice, is unknown.
         At this point Mouser, claiming to have first desired Tategoi's involvement in his evening meal, contested Seaweed's claim to the somewhat concerned fish.  A few hisses, raised back ruffs, and general fur puffing resulted in Kendra, local Kitsune, resolving the question of who would eat Tategoi by tossing Seaweed a few mussels.  Seaweed's attention was at once focused on the mussels and off of Tategoi (much to his relief). Seaweed then laid on her back in true otter style and began cracking open the mussels, tossing the shells at Mouser.  Seaweed enjoyed the mussels and at the end gave Mouser one.  Mouser noted why, 50 million years in the future, Fursnakes had not occupied the niche at one time filled by otters due to the lack of extremities.  In a signal of good sportsmanship, Seaweed cracked the shell for Mouser.
         After agreeing to no hard feelings, both settled into Rose Garden chit-chat until the arrival of Morticon, local Wallaby and alleged leader of the SED.  Morticon, claiming that Mouser was his henchfur (seemingly confirmed by Mouser addressing Morticon as 'boss'), ordered Mouser to, "do something evil to Seaweed."  Mouser reluctantly told Morticon, "But she just fed me, boss."
         Morticon then made claims that the only way Mouser ate at all was through the fact that he fed him.  Morticon seemed to overlook the times Argon, Local Centaur, had offered Mouser free run of Centaur Square to eat his fill of the rodents there. Mouser's resistance caused Morticon to hustle off and retrieve an 'Otter Tech mini-matter-transporter',  which when activated promptly broke out in flames.  Mouser, busy munching on scallops, either failed to see or chose to ignore his 'boss's' equipment problems.
         Seeing as Mouser was more interested in food than following his orders, Morticon attempted to tempt Mouser with the idea of an SED produced set of prosthetic limbs, claiming , "I would hook it into your brain so it would work seamlessly.  You could then join us furries as an equal, instead of a snake-like being."
         After some discussion concerning what types of equipment might be installed and to what prurient interests Morticon might use them for along with the unavoidable comparisons to Earthworm Jim, Mouser decided to eat all the seafood he could and discuss the matter with his employer at a later time.  After some negotiations and an Indian rub, Mouser finally agreed to allow Morticon to build the 'Mousersuit' and continue to do dastardly deeds for Morticon and the SED.
In Other News...
         Vassily now has more menu items at McCthulu's.  'Luge' on over to N3 W4 and give them a try.  Taste "the refreshing taste of the darkest abyss", as Vassily puts it.
         RP Central's bulletin board is still around, and can be used to describe an RP you are involved with, or your RP preferences so maybe a fellow RPer can find you.
         The Christmas Tree will be moved very soon to the retirement area, so add your ornaments in the park before it is too late!
         Mouser supposedly took a bag of hamsters in exchange for the location of the SED Headquarters.  It remains to be seen if the exchange really took place or was successful.
         Kulan is considering, as discussed a while back during a newspaper meeting, making the text of the newspaper issues available on the muck.  If you have any ideas as to how this should be implemented or where it should be placed, let him know via page #mail or vote in the park.
         Spindizzy's population has dropped sharply over winter break.  It is unknown if the SED has kidnapped those missing or if they are getting Carebear tummy symbols.  Hopefully they will all be back before long.
The Doze Garden

@Action News Info Guidelines and Procedure for Submitting Articles
>> Procedure for submitting an article:
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  The End