Remember back on Toons, Fur and Fluff (for those of you who were there) when we had the manditory PG rating? What happened to it? Did it simply mysteriously dissapear into thin air? Is Parade Kid somehow involved?
This was a shocking revelation to me the other day - SpinDizzy has no arbitrarily set public area rating! My god, we're allowed to even think for ourselves, and do things that might be deemed immoral by the Christian Coalition (although probably not people from FurryMUCK). When asked to comment on this shocking issue, Austin simply replied along the lines that everybody should simply act in good taste - in other words, talking about corn muffin sex in the park is perfectly fine. So is talking about sex with a hat, although the two are not entirely unrelated.
So what are we going to do? Form the MUCK version of the PMRC, led by disgruntled mustelids and former SED members, eager to stamp out all references to the Portal of Evil and Internet personalities with multicoloured hair? Personally, I think we should just let it rest - being the only MUCK in existance (a popular one, anyway) which has absolutely no public area guidelines is kind of nice. I just needed something to write and whine about, that I could put stupid blind links in.
Dolly, who is a soap bubble, was the object of Morticon's attentions the other night. After seeing her form, he came up with the ridiculous idea of 'cloning' Dolly, and taking over the muck with evil soap bubbles. As onlookers stood transfixed, Morticon captured Dolly and took her to his secret lab. Argon, having been a 'guest' there at one time, knew the location and gathered up a group of rescuers to retrieve Dolly from the clutches of Morticon.
Austin, Theo and Skyler joined Argon in the rescue effort. After entering Morticon's dark, smelly cave. The group was confronted by Morticon's mecha-duplicates. All were inactive, except for the MechaPing which, upon their arrival moved back to the darker reaches of Morticon's home. There, an unwashed bed was found, along with several stale corn muffins. MechaPing had disappeared. A quick search by the group found a secret entrance. Entering, a large laboratory was found.
Upon the entrance of the rescuers, Morticon seemed shocked, and asked how we had gotten in. Dolly, seemingly unhurt, floated above and examination table, but Morticon's evil work had already been done. The rescuers were attacked by millions of tiny soap bubbles. It was remarked that this was probably the first soap that had touched Morticon.
As the soap bubbles attacked, Morticon threatened to turn on giant fans, which would suck Dolly through them, and destroy her. Argon picked up Austin, and tossed him toward the grills of the fans, suggesting he use his elastic properties to stop the flow of air, and save Dolly. At the same time, Morticon lowered steel. electrified spikes to stop the rescuers.
Morticon, feeling safe standing on an insulated platform laughed thinking the rescuers were done for. Argon suggested to Theo that he use his Toon Powers to pour water on the platform and shock Morticon.
Theo, reaching into a pocket pulled out...a fish! He then bent the fish into a V shape and tossed it at Morticon. The Fisherang hit Morticon who stumbled and switched on the fans! Morticon then pressed another switch which lifted the grills, leaving Austin hanging on to the now spinning fan blades, Theo retrieved his Fisherang and using it, turned off both the electric spikes, and the fans. But not until he suffered some burned fur, and the centrifugal force had stretched Austin into a long thin Coati spaghetti strand.
In the confusion, Morticon slipped away and was not captured. However, Dolly was recovered safely, and within a day, all had returned to normal.
Thursday, April 13 -- Not quite thirty years after the oxygen tank explosion that left the flight of Apollo 13 struggling for survival as it flew around the moon, multiple manifestations of Theo, onetime wizard and longtime raccoon, affected the SFOXS Space Station Promenade.
After asking again to become a wizard, ne'er-do-well and jackanapes Morticon, provisional leader of the Society of Evil Doers, received his wish for the second time. In the first experience earlier this week Morticon found himself becoming CtheEagle, a fluffy, puffy eagle wizard of FeatherMuck. This time, he became Theo.
The multiple Theos proceeded to run around one another, hoping to spread confusion and Bloom County quotes while fretting nervously about vague issues. Their repeated demands that people guess which Theo was originally Theo, and which was originally Morticon, were met with lighthearted cheer and comically inaccurate guesses. (It was later revealed that the correct Theo was Theo; the other Theo was Morticon.)
Confusion turned to confusion when Morticon, sporting the body of a vixen and the personality of a different vixen, strode into the room, causing the several Theos to flock to her, though it's not clear at this time what it was meant to accomplish.
There are several features of Theo that one can use to tell whether one is speaking to Theo, or someone else. Among them are Theo's name -- generally, Theo, although sometimes Blain or Opus -- and the facts that he has a computer, is familiar with the "Internet," and spends some of his time working, and some of his time sleeping. Theo also is noted for having activities, pastimes and the occasional diversion.
Later in the day, there was only one Theo to be found, and one Morticon, who was again a bioengineered wallaby. All claimed to be back to normal and the crisis of many Theos found itself at the end -- or is it?
Although there was no winner for the Name That Newspaper Contest, there were two finalists, who were qualified to be such because they could read directions. For now, the newspaper will have a brand-new stupid name every time it gets published. But without further ado, so you can laugh at them next time you see them, here are the entries of The Finalists:
For those of you with short memories, you might wish to be re-exposed to last week's puzzle before we go on with the answers:
You are required to take two pills a day in order to stay alive - Pill A and Pill B. Both pills are exactly identical in every way perceptible, except that if you take more than one of each pill a day you die a horrible, agonizing death. While getting the pills from the bottle, you accidentally end up with three pills - and you're not sure which bottle the extra pill came from, but you still need to take one of each. So - how do you get your exact amount of medication, without dying and without throwing away any pills?