By: Argon

On May 12th, Captain Ami, of The Space Marines, informed Commander Domino and Sgt. Major Linda that a large space-faring vessel was headed to our planet.

In an informational meeting with the top leaders of the Space Marines, Captain Ami revealed that an alien race known as 'The Collectors' are expected to arrive here within two months.

'The Collectors' purpose is to sweep through space collecting anything that is of use to them, usually stripping a planet clean. Although generally their drones will ignore life forms, if any resistance is offered, they will not hesitate to kill. It is also known that life forms they find tasty will be captured and bred for food.

While this may be terrifying news, the Space Marines claim to have the situation under control, and are developing contingency plans against this enemy, but because of security concerns most information was classified. It was revealed, however, that the beings themselves appear to be two-foot long slugs, with their collector drones having the appearance of giant armored crabs.

In a related story, sales of PowerMac Laptops and anti-virus programs have increased markedly at the release of this news.



The long awaited trial of Professor Moriarty was thrown out even before making it to court. After a week of anticipation by the citizens of TF&F, the MUCK's most notorious scoundrel was released onto the streets of the city with no more than a minor inconvenience to show for his brush with the law.

Argon, acting as Moriarty's counsel, stated that, "It is just as well that these vague and fraudulent charges were dropped. It would have been an embarrassment to Austin City Limits for my client to bring false arrest, libel, defamation, and numerous other charges against the civic authorities and private individuals bringing these claims against my client."

Argon went on at length to state that although his client's innocence was obvious, to explain further might jeopardize the defense of his client against other frivolous charges in the future. "I would think carefully about bringing formal accusations against anyone unless you have a full and proper understanding of the law and its intent," Argon said.

Although attempts were made, the other principles in this case were unavailable for comment. No one knows what charges may be brought up in the future for Moriarty, but it is certain that his name will be a constant feature in The Ferret.


Interview with Argon
By: Tarquol

I got the chance to interview Argon, and learned much about him in doing so. This interview was conducted before he started the Short Story Square, which currently happens every Saturday at 10pm CST. It was also done before Moriarty's trial was cancelled.

Without further delay, here's the interview!

Tarquol: May I ask why you wanted to defend Moriarty the Criminal from the charges that Damien brought against him?
Argon: I'm doing it more because Damien has such a weak case than anything,and I owe Moriarty a favor or two.
Tarquol: You think that you have a good case then? Any reason why?
Argon: Well, Moriarty is just a likeable guy, really. That's one of the nice things about this MUCK, everyone knows most everyone else, and we all get along well. Most people like Moriarty.
Tarquol: When you said that you were doing a favor for Moriarty. Does that mean you support the SED?
Argon: No, not at all. I am not evil or criminal at all.
Tarquol: Could you tell us a little about yourself?
Argon: Well, as you can see, I am a Centaur, like the creatures from Greek Mythology: the torso of a human male (in my case) blended with the body of a horse. Unlike many of the furs here, I wasn't born this way.
Tarquol: How did that come to be?
Argon: Well, I was born human, and had always had an interest in Centaurs. I thought they were beautiful in their own way, and I thought it would be nice to be one.
Tarquol: How did you become one?
Argon: Through a series of events (that I could tell you, but it's kind of a long story) I woke up one morning in this form. This was in the Real World, by the way, or the Human World, where my player lives. I hid out for a while, not sure how to deal with it, but through the web I came in contact with other Centaurs. One of then, Mavra, a female, brought me to FurryMUCK, and that's how I wound up here.
Tarquol: Interesting. So you don't know why you changed then?
Argon: Well, I received an e-mail that was included in some bulk advertising, inferring a series of experiments by a part of the government to create Centaurs. I was an unknowing result of one of those experiments. It had to do with blood samples from one who was already a Centaur, and some sort of binding agent in my DNA. Whatever the cause, I'm glad it happened.
Tarquol: What, to you, is the best thing about TF&F?
Argon: I would have to say the friendliness of the players, and their willingness to help. Also, there is a lot going on here; The Story Circle and The Ferret are good examples.
Tarquol: Who are some of the people?
Argon: Well, Austin, of course. Tarka, Mina, Chit, Blain and Bob, gee... most everyone!
Tarquol: Can you tell me something about them?
Argon: Well...Tarka is a hug-friendly otter, and does the story circles. Chit is a Squirrel. Blain is a player but calls himself the 'Master of Puppets'. Austin is the main wiz. Mina is a Vixen. All nice folks. There are lots more, like Rocko the Wallaby that is the editor of The Ferret, and Ami, the Cybervixentaur.
Tarquol: How about yourself Argon? What do you do here on TF&F?
Argon: I've done a bit of building, though Mina, B.J. and others have helped me a lot. I like attending Tarka's Story Circle and writing an occasional article for The Ferret. Plus visiting in the park. I've been allowed to do more building here that any other MUCK I've been on. It's fun. I built the Lost In Space Robot Statue (The original LIS Robot, thank you) and 'The Great One's' Sanctuary. Mina and B.J. pulled me out of some tough spots in both projects.
Tarquol: How did you come to TF&F? Did someone ask you here or did you just find your way?
Argon: I saw a post Austin put up on FurryMUCK. I stopped in as a guest and was instantly impressed with the friendliness of the furs here and the accessibility of the Wizzes. It soon became my favorite.
Tarquol: So this is your home as it were? The place where most of your friends are?
Argon: Yes, definitely.
Tarquol: On a ending note, is there anything else that you think that you might like to tell the readers of our paper?
Argon: I would like to say thanks to all of the players and characters here who have made me feel so welcome and helped me out so much. I feel I could ask anyone here for a favor and they would do so without question or judgement. I think that it is places like TF&F that give MUCKing a good name, rather than perpetuate the bad stigma of many other MUCKs. I'm very happy to have found the place and all the friends I have made here. Being here has made improvements in my RL that I may not have made any other way. Thanks to all of you!


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