Incorporating The SpinDizzy Times Dispatch, And The Ferret

SpinDizzy's Newspaper

Published weekly except when it isn't

Argon Editor

Vol 1 Issue 13                                                 Sunday - July 2, 2K

Aliens Use Probe On Morticon

Morticon, well known local Wallaby and alleged leader of the SED claims to have been visited by two aliens, calling themselves Belzar and Grignak, Morticon claims that they cornered him in Role Play Central and forced "..acts so heinous I cannot begin to describe them."  Morticon, insisting that rather than aliens, he was attacked and 'probed' by local Centaurs, Argon and Mavra.   Morticon's claim is supported by local Care Bear TugsBear who agreed that in appearance at any rate, the 'aliens' did look just like the engaged Centaurs, but expressed doubt that they would do such a thing even to Morticon.

Tugs reported that the aliens grabbed Morticon and used a probe of some sort to determine his "..suitability for a breeding program on a planet full of space vixens."  However, the aliens rejected Morticon, after an inspection beneath his pouch revealed that he didn't "...measure up to the standards the space vixens required."  TugsBear also claimed the aliens dismissed using him, as he was immediately seen as too young to breed.

Argon claims that at the time of this occurrence, he and Mavra were in the glade off Centaur Square enjoying a gallop. But stated that he did see a "spinning disk with lots of flashing lights..." rise into the sky from the area of RPC at about the time of Morticon's alleged 'examination.'

Anthrocon Computer Room Makes Home On SpinDizzy

Furries and fans unable to enjoy Anthrocon this weekend, were able to simulate the experience in the Park Of The Day this weekend.  By entering 'Park' you could replicate the fun and pleasure of enjoying giant bags of cheesy puffs which have had the hands of many a slobbering fanboy deep within them, along with no-name soda pop in such bad flavors that by the end of the Con, only three cans had been spilled into the keyboards of the computers.

SpinDizzy's own, Max, Royce, and Topaz report ably attended the con, but have yet to report any of the usual stories of unwashed Anime fans shouting Japanese war cries in the stairwell, or the horror of 'fanboy sandwiches'.

On a side note, a lost OUTPUT FILE was discovered and is looking for a program to read it.  If you can help it, please contact the Commodore, or Gilligan.

Ping Discovered To Be Math Genius

Ping, well known Mouse and local Wiz defied doomsayers and his own self doubts by doing extremely well in several math tests. Expressing some concern about his ability to grasp the concepts being taught, and further worries over his ability to apply these concepts under the stress and pressure of a testing situation have been proven inconsequential.   Recent exams of the tiny Mouse, have shown that he has a large brain, that seems well suited for mathematics.  

When asked to comment on this gratifying revelation of his powers of calculation, Ping, in his usual self depreciating manner just said he was lucky, and that only time would tell if his abilities were based in actual knowledge of the material, or if the scores were merely a fluke.  Congratulations were lauded on Ping, and wishes were made that his success in mathematics would continue.  After discussions with Stephen Hawkins and Ouiji communications with Albert Einstein, the Unifying Theory is just a few calculations away.

What's The Best Thing About Being A (Insert Your Species Here)?

Argon asked some folks this question and got these replies from:

TugsBear (Care Bear) - "Because Care bears are cute, snuggly, and.. all sorts of fun!!"

Clarisa (Cetan) - "I enjoy playing a unique race that I created and sharing my creation with others."

Flutterz (Wanna be Dread Pirate, Flower Fae) - "S'bein DREAD a'course! Lotsa sparklieshinystuffs and peeps be a'scared of yous!  S'player be the wanna be....Flutterz be DREAD!"

Liz (Weredragron) - Liz thinks the best thing about being a weredragon is not having to pay for heating in the winter. We're mobile space heaters, you know.

LilBit (Mouse) -  "I can get most anywhere. I can fit in most places you can't.  Everyone always underestimates me."

Chen (Human) - "Thumbs? Standing upright? No tail to slam in a door? I don't know, I've never been anything else."

Shadow (Foxkit) - "Ice cream. Def'nly the ice cream.

Findra (Bunny) - "Hmm. You mean apart from being the most highly respected species of all, and also the most modest? =:)"

Nikon (Raccoon) - Nikon likes her nimble little fingers, her cute mask, fluffy fur, and ringed tail and hugging your ankles!

Anja (The Amazing Arabian) - "Braking the mold."

Austin (Coati) - "It fits perfectly well with my self image."

Terra (Not-Quite-There-Minky) - "Not having to obey the laws of physics."

Morticon (OzBioTech Wallaby Model XG6) - "That I'm good looking, fast, strong, and evil. Oh yeah, and intelligent, seeing that wallabies are the smartest creature on SD."

Theo (Raccoon) - Slurpies, and opposable thumbs.

Standen (Leopine) - "Having attributes of two exceptional animals."

Mavra (Centaur) - Well, I figure that being a centaur, I can easily handle any sort of untoward action by a human" 

Mouser (Fursnake) - "Job security. There's always SOMEONE society thinks needs to be eaten.  and quite a few that society doesn't, but are too slow for their own good."

Maxl (Badger)- "I'm not a centaur."

Ping (Mouse) -" Because I can look up to everyone."


Terra Announces Birth of Kits

Terra smiles. "Five of them, Three males, two females, all of them healthy and strong. Ferris, Mala, Sherri, Craig, and Lyle...they're all hairless right now, their eyes closed   Terra has yet to publicly state who might be the father of the kits, although rumors abound, none substantiated.  Nogra, yiffy Centaur stallion claims fatherhood, but Nogra claims a number of 'conquests' which have not happened.  Regardless of the name of the father, Terra is congratulated and wished the best along with her new family.

Local Centaur Turns 'Toon

MsDee, local Centaur after stepping into a can of 'Toon paint carelessly left open by Ping, decided to take the plunge and cover herself with the paint and become a 'Toon.  After convincing B.J. to help by painting the spots she couldn't reach, and making him blush deeply as he attempted to 'paint' the front of her Human torso, and it's associated parts. MsDee became completely 'Toon. Although a needed addition to SpinDizzy's 'Toon community, the population is still dangerously small.

Adapting quickly to life as a 'Toon, Dee leaned over and gave B.J. a big kiss.  Poor B.J. being Toony himself, had steam coming out of his ears, and his eyes turned into dials with their needles in the red! Dee then made advances toward Argon, who reminded Dee of his engagement to Mavra, and of course the problems their relatives sizes would present.  (MsDee standing about 2 and 1/2 feet tall nd Argon and 8 and 1/2feet.) Dee noted that "Toons can stretch.".  Argon at that point blushed and headed home.

At last report, MsDee was still a 'Toon Centaur, and Argon was still engaged.  No report has been received on B.J.'s condition as of press time.

Flutterz Gathering Funds For Orphanage

In a rare act of philanthropy, Morticon, alleged leader of the SED pledged a gift of 20,000 shinies to help Flutterz build and operate "the li'l lost aphid orphanage".  In some sort of typical spur of the moment plan that wasn't thought out or considered, Morticon, after receiving an orbiting spy satellite with laser guns on it, decided to blast the Rose Garden, injuring a number of Flutterz's aphid pets, and giving Ping quite a scare. After  Terra and Kendra implanted a 'happy chip' into Morticon's spine, which caused him to be very nice for about half an hour, during which time he made the pledge of 20,000 shines to Flutterz's in reparation for his cruel act. The 'happy chip' was dissolved by Morticon's own neural net within about an hour.


Contributing To @Action News

Several folks have asked how to contribute stories and ideas to this paper.  It's quite easy. Just write your story down, and send it to argon@spindizzy.org. Or page #mail it to Argon.  Even if you don't think you can write well, or haven't fully developed your idea, send it along.  Our huge editorial staff can take any information and make a story from it. What you may consider a silly thing, or something no one cares about, could more than likely be of interest to our readers.  Look at the stories we print.  No Nobel Prize winners here.  

Although our vast network of reporters, stringers, and informants cover SpinDizzy like a glove, sometimes things get by us, or we miss an opportunity to inform you, our readers.  We depend on you to tell us not only things of interest to you, but to give us ideas and suggestions to make this paper better.  This is YOUR paper, so let us know what YOU'D like to see in it.  

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